stop. and breathe.

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“Enjoy all the things you’re doing because you’re not doing all the things.”

Andy Stanley, “Breathing Room”

I hope you have a beautiful weekend of celebrating October, being surrounded by people you love, and by enjoying the things you love to do. I hope you find yourself trusting Him and His plan for you by knowing your limits and believing that He has you covered. He knows your needs and you can trust Him to cover it. Stop living in fear. Stop living to please. And believe that you matter, not because of what you do or what you own, but because He first loved you.

This is Day 19 of 31 Days of Creating White Space

the white screen of rest

*Yesterday, I wrote a post for Ashley called Peace in the Process, and I’d love it if you would go over there and read it to see how we’ve found peace on this little year-long journey to contentment. 

white space 9

I had a small little series within this series planned to start today all about finding white space in the Christmas season. But my trusty Macbook gave me the “white screen of death” this morning, so let’s all say a little prayer that it’s just a “white screen of rest.” Maybe my laptop needed some white space, too. (Thank goodness we have another machine around here that I could use.)

Picture 1

So the Christmas posts will have to wait.

And, golly, I have so much to say, still! We’re on Day 18 of this white space journey, and I am curious to know how many of you are living this with me? And living this with Whitney? And anyone else who has done this and lived it and wanted to jump in and encourage.

If you want to catch up on the past 18 days, here are all of the posts of 31 Days of Creating White Space. But I would love to hear from you. Community and relationship is the whole idea behind creating white space for me. I’m creating space for God to move and space to see the good and space to foster community.

Day One: Why White Space?

Day Two: My Need for White Space

Day Three: fear & striving

Day Four: Who stole my white space? 

Day Five: White space & the weekend

Day Six: white space = rest 

Day Seven: the wardrobe & white space

Day Eight: goals to create white space 

Day Nine: your home is your story

Day Ten: #onebigtruth

Day Eleven: planning an organized home

Day Twelve: white space & the weekend (2)

Day Thirteen: resting in what was good this week

Day Fourteen: but what if it’s good stuff?

Day Fifteen: the great toy purge: white space for the kids

Day Sixteen: the great toy purge part II (what happened to the toys)

Day Seventeen: life happens in the white space

This is day 18 in 31 Days of Creating White Space.

 

 

 

life happens in the whitespace

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*Friends, I have a real treat for you today. Treat is an understatement. You will read this and say, “That’s good, right there” no less than ten times. My sweet friend, the talented Whitney English, is sharing her white space testimony with all of you today. You can follow Whitney’s blog and find her on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest

life happens in the white space

When Erin asked me to write a spot about creating whitespace in life, I had a great idea for a post rolling around in my head. Unfortunately, I forgot to write it down, and I’ve spent the past two weeks sort of hoping it would creep back to the surface of my ideas. It hasn’t. So, I thought I’d tell you a story.

A little over a year ago, my husband, David, and I found ourselves in a bit of a financial mess. I don’t believe in over-dramatizing things, but I do want to be honest and explain that it was a very serious situation. Almost overnight, our family went from being able to afford basic things, to not being able to afford basics. We had been struggling financially for almost a year before that, and we had lived that year in a state of assumption–that things would get better.

When things took a drastic turn for the worse, our lives were shaken to the core.

We started pinching pennies. A little bit of money would come in, and we’d stretch it as far as we could.

We quit using paper towels. We pushed diapers to last as far as they could.

We cooked through every canned good in the pantry–and it turns out, you can make a cake or a casserole out of ANYTHING!

We didn’t just conserve what we bought–we quit shopping. Just flat out didn’t go to Target, or the mall, or click on anything that would lead to an e-commerce website. The only store we shopped at was Aldi.

If we couldn’t get it at Aldi, we didn’t buy it.

The month after all this happened, I had my third child, and one of my best friends brought us a giant basket of fun kids food for the boys. The treats were simple, but now luxuries–a package of chewy fruit snacks was not a necessity, and would get skipped over at the store.

We bought ONLY what we needed, when we needed it, and not a day before.

And an AMAZING thing happened. It turns out, we don’t need really need that much to LIVE.

By eating what we had in stores, we spent no more than $75 at the grocery store every couple of weeks.

By not walking into Target, we quit being tempted by the end-caps of sale stuff and cute new holiday decorations.

By not being able to purchase new clothes, we started taking better care of what we had.

By not wanting to spend money on consumable products, we adopted practices that were better for the environment.

By not being able to go to restaurants, and eat out, we made adventures out of small outings, packing peanut butter sandwiches, and learned to love the wind in our face. (I’m not an outdoorsy girl, so that’s quite an accomplishment for me!)

If that wasn’t amazing enough, another unexpected blessing occurred. As I started to realize that living with less was OK, that we would survive without a cute new pumpkin from Target, an idea crept into my mind: on top of the challenge of living with less, what if we decreased even more?

In addition to using what we had in stores, what if we started getting rid of stuff?

The year-long purge began. The challenge became: how do we use it up, or give it away?

Cans of paint in the garage were used for fun DIY projects. We white-washed our entire house with one can of old paint! Sure, it was work, but it was a fun project and great time together.

We had garage sales and sold stuff on Craigslist and eBay, and started realizing that we had more stuff than we could get rid of in any one sitting. Talk about an embarrassing realization–so much stuff that you can’t purge it all.

I don’t know if I should be proud of what I’m about to tell you, but I’ve now gone more than a year without purchasing new shampoo for myself. That’s how many little bottles of hotel shampoo and old hair product I had lying around–enough to keep me stocked for over a year.

The end of the story is almost obvious: we survived, and we are better for it.

More disciplined, for sure. More grateful times a million.

The gratitude I found at the bottom of this experience was amazing. When faced with the choice of either liking what you already have, or having to go without, it’s amazing how quickly you decide to like what you have.

The justifications kick in, I promise. The concern about what other people think fades away–simply because you can’t afford to care what people think. It takes just as much energy to talk yourself out of buying the shirt, instead of talking yourself into it. And I learned that the long-term result of buying the shirt isn’t as gratifying as the long-term result of not buying it.

Our society suffers from the burden of abundance, friends. And we don’t know it.

The world will always tell us we need more–but we don’t. We need less.

As I leaned towards minimalism this past year, wholeheartedly embracing the experience of not accumulating more, and adopting the practice of using up what we had, I found unexpected white space, and the gift of a new freedom.

The simplicity of living without stuff attached was a gift that brought gratitude, pushed my creativity, challenged my personal growth, encouraged me in more faith, and gave me the blessing of abundant LIFE, instead of abundant STUFF.

LIFE happens in the whitespace.

Challenge for friends: are the choices you are making pushing you towards abundant LIFE or abundant STUFF?

This is Day 17 of 31 Days of Creating White Space

the great toy purge part II (what happened to the toys)

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With two little boys, we’ve been very very lucky that toys get used twice as much. But it has also been a little difficult to shop for them for birthdays and holidays because no one needs anything.

But with grandparents, friends, family, and parents all buying for them, it had just gotten out of hand. (I have a post coming about Christmas.)

For birthdays, we’ve suggested that in lieu of gifts guests bring a donation to the food bank, a children’s shelter, and just forego gifts completely. And this always works, and we’re so glad that our friends are willing to attend parties to celebrate and know that a gift is not necessary.

After I decided we needed to clean out the toys, I got the boys involved.

Hudson and I decided to have four different categories: donate, storage, KK & Poppie’s house, and RC & PC’s house.

For the donate category, I decided to include things that were either duplicate toys or just don’t get played with. We had about six plastic lions. For a while, Hudson’s favorite animal was a lion. So he got a lion in his stocking or a lion in his Easter basket. And the lions just kept on coming. So we donated a lot of the things that weren’t getting played with.

For the storage category, we included things that are played with, but decided to move toys into a rotation. So the boys won’t have all of their toys at all times. But every couple of months we will bring things out of storage and re-introduce them. We have done this a few times before with some toys after we moved. We brought them back out five months later and the boys went crazy over their “new” toys. Hiding them and bringing them back out is a great solution for us to keep things fresh and new without buying all new toys.

For KK & Poppie/RC & PC’s house (the grandparents), this worked out well. These were toys that they still really like, but don’t always have to have at home. And Todd’s parents and my parents are kind enough to keep our kids overnight and like to have toys at their houses for the boys. So we went through and decided on some toys that could be left at their houses and they’d play with them when they visit.

All of this has helped a lot with creating a more organized play space for the boys, and have more of an idea of what they actually have. And it’s just made it a lot more fun for them to play.

Their favorite toys are their train table, their Legos Duplos, and puzzles.

I want Hudson and Hayes to enjoy playing with their toys and have fun while still being able to take care of their things. We have a different plan for this year’s Christmas, but just like with my closet, any time we get something new, we get rid of something else.

It’s all a work in progress, and my kiddos definitely have the “gimmes” just like every other kid.

What systems have you found that work for you and your kids?

This post is Day 16 for 31 Days of Creating White Space

 

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