Dear Hayes,

I cannot believe how quickly your first month has flown by. For most of the first two weeks we had our struggles with you being a “lazy eater” and losing too much weight. Now that we’re strictly on formula (you are taking Similac Sensitive), you are thriving. And I have lots more time to devote to you and your wild brother.

Some days it seems like you spend all day sleeping and some days you are very very alert. You have the brightest eyes and seem to be just taking everything in.

For the most part, you’re really laid back. You manage to sleep through Hudson’s loud noise and the dogs barking. You fall asleep on your own for every nap and every bedtime. You don’t need to be rocked. I still sneak in a couple of minutes of rocking before I put you in your bed.

Right now, we feed you between 8:00-8:30 p.m. and put you to bed. We wake you up for a “dream feeding” at 11:00 and put you back to bed. You sleep until 3:00, eat a little, and go back to sleep until 6:30. You take a morning nap until around 9:00.

You’re a good baby and have fit in so perfectly with our family. We just love you so much!

Your Aunt Nina thought you needed to have your own Jelly Cats stuffed animal to pose with every month. I gave a monkey to Hudson before he was born and Aunt Nina gave you this gorilla. I’m so excited to measure you up next to the gorilla every month to see how big you are!

We love you, baby Hayes!

Mommy

1 month stats:

Weight: 9 lbs 14 oz
Height: 22 inches
Eating: 3-4 ounces per bottle, 8 bottles per day
Clothes: 0-3 month and some 3 month
Diaper: Size 1

Nothing is ever perfect and nothing ever goes exactly how you hope it will. Even though I’m a little shy about the whole breast feeding thing, I’m going to talk about it a little bit right now.

With Hudson, we had to supplement formula as soon as he came home from the hospital. He had lost 10 percent of his birth weight and was jaundiced, so the pediatricians and lactation consultants told us to breast feed and give him formula. He was back up to his birth weight in two days.

I had a feeling that the same things would happen with Hayes. He was 8 lbs, 12 oz at birth, but was 7 lb, 13 oz the day we came home from the hospital. When they told me he had lost more than 10 percent of his birth weight, I fell apart. In the middle of the hospital hallway, I had massive tears coming down my face and I could barely talk through the hiccups. I’m pretty sure my mom thought I had lost my marbles.

It’s just formula. Hayes is fine. Why was I so emotional about it? Did I really think I’d have this magical time nursing my baby and he would be completely satisfied and gaining tons of weight just from what I could give him? I’m not sure why I thought that after Hudson’s experience. I should have known my body. And I guess I did deep down, but receiving the news wasn’t fun!

So I thought I’d share a little bit about our feeding journey up to this point so I’ll remember it and to hopefully offer encouragement to other struggling moms.

4 Days Old:
Heading home from the hospital, but we get the word that Hayes has lost just over a pound and we need to supplement with formula. His bilirubin level is just shy of needing phototherapy, but with the formula and indirect sunlight, he should be fine. We got instructions to go back to the doctor the next day.

5 Days Old:
Hayes was spitting up every ounce of formula we gave him, so we stopped until we could see the pediatrician. At the appointment, his weight was up an ounce and bilirubin was down to a “safe” place. We were asked to come back in two days to weigh him again. We got the okay to just breast feed.

7 Days Old:
We visited the lactation consultant at our pediatrician’s office. Hayes’s bilirubin was way up and his weight was down again. I fed him in front of her and it was determined that he is a lazy eater and isn’t making the most of his feedings. I am making plenty of milk for him, but he’s not doing the work to get it. We decided to supplement again, but with a different formula. I also decided to pump breast milk rather than nurse him and feed him bottles so we could get a more accurate idea of how much he’s eating.

8 Days Old:
We went back to the pediatrician and Hayes was up 3 ounces from the previous day and his bilirubin was way down. The formula and pumping combination worked!

We have decided to make this our long term plan. It makes for a very busy schedule for me between feeding, pumping, and feeding, but I want to do what is best for Hayes. I’ll continue this as long as I feel like it’s also good for me.

I was so encouraged to see how much he benefitted from the formula and pumped bottle combination. I had been so stressed every day thinking about how skinny he was getting and wondering what else we could do to help him. After the appointment with the lactation consultant, I see that I was doing everything I could to nurse him, but these changes would help him a lot.

The sense of relief that I now have is wonderful and I’m really getting to enjoy my sweet baby without the stress and pressure of getting him back to his birth weight. I’m confident now that he’ll be back to birth weight by his two week appointment.