The Night Before We Meet James Walker

We’re heading to the hospital tomorrow morning to meet our precious baby boy. Our third baby boy. Most likely our last baby.

As I sit here thinking about what that means, I’m overwhelmed with peace. Almost six years ago, we were getting ready to go meet our first baby boy and I was anxious and afraid and excited and had no idea what to expect.

This time I know what to expect when I get to the hospital. I know what’s going to happen in pre-op and a general idea of how it will feel in the operating room. I am praying that things go smoothly and that James Walker and I both stay healthy and that other than a precious baby entering this world, the procedure is uneventful.

A couple of days ago I sat down and watched the videos of Hudson and Hayes’s birth. I cried and cried as I relived those experiences and it made me so excited to get to experience it one more time with a baby that we have prayed so hard for.

The nursery is ready. We’ve pulled out the baby gear- though we’re using a whole lot less gear this time. We’ve washed bottles and washed sweet baby clothes. And there’s just a feeling of peace.

We’re so excited for the boys. Hudson has asked me if he can put his Ninja Turtles in James Walker’s room as a welcome home gift. Hayes scrunches up his little nose and talks about how cute the baby is going to be. They can’t wait to meet their baby brother. And I can’t wait to see them when they meet their baby brother.

The instant that Hudson was born my heart grew in ways I never imagined. And when Hayes was born, I was even more surprised at how much I could love another baby. And I just know that James Walker is going to grow and soften us all even more.

I imagine a house full of wild boys who love fiercely and wrestle with the best of them. I imagine a 4-year-old James Walker playing outside and learning how to throw a baseball from his 10 and 8-year-old big brothers.

My sweet daddy told me yesterday that I was such a girly girl and never liked any “boy things.” I didn’t like sports and I wasn’t a tom boy in any sense of the word. Yet here I am. A mom to three sweet blessings and it’s my responsibility and Todd’s responsibility to grow them into men of God. And there is no responsibility that I take more seriously than that one. I may have been a girly girl, but I am a boy’s mama through and through.

I see their hearts and their vulnerabilities and their need for toughness and need for sweetness. And as we get ready to welcome this little book end to our family, I’m just overwhelmed with complete gratitude for the weight of this responsibility. To raise a little person that will one day become a man.

And on the days that I’m frazzled and overwhelmed and don’t know what to do with all the noise and chaos mixed with all the love and gratitude, I’m just going to pray that I always remember how I feel in this very moment.

I’ve carried James Walker for 40 precious weeks. My body is a wreck. My heartburn is out of control. I’ve gained a lot of weight and will no doubt be welcoming a very large boy into this world. I’ve rubbed my belly and prayed for him in the night when I can’t sleep. I prayed for the time to pass quickly in those first 15 weeks of total sickness. I prayed for his little body to grow stronger each day and thanked God so much for the promise that He knows James Walker through and through. He knows every single little thing about him and He has always known him. And I’ve found profound comfort in that.

And as this time comes to a close and I get ready to see my baby’s sweet face and to see my precious husband hold him for the first time, I can’t think of much else to say other than “thank you.” This time has truly been a privilege. To be this boy’s mama will be one of the greatest joys of my life. And the introduction that awaits us tomorrow is something that is completely miraculous and truly God-breathed.

Thank you for praying for our family and for all of your sweet words over the past few months. Please continue to pray as we gear up for tomorrow’s surgery and James Walker’s arrival.


Hospital Bag Packing List for Mom & Baby

I finally started packing my hospital bag yesterday. It’s a good thing I haven’t gone into labor because I’ve been acting like I have all the time in the world until James Walker arrives. My due date is March 3 and I’m scheduled for a repeat c-section on March 3. Just a few more days to get things done around here.

I decided to recreate my hospital bag packing list from a few years ago to make it easier to read. Nothing has really changed. In addition to clothes for the baby and me, toiletries, and things to keep your feet warm and off the hospital floor, I include things like notebooks (for keeping track of thank you notes I may need to write) and folders (for keeping up with important documents.) I just like to be prepared. I like to bring a few pillows- especially after a c-section, so I can make sure I’m well-supported and that getting in and out of the bed is as easy as possible.

I didn’t list specific brands or links, but I do have some favorites that I’ve used over the years. But I know everyone has their favorites and their preferences. This list is just a guideline of some things that I don’t like to be without while in the hospital. I’m expecting a 3-day stay, so while the packing list may seem long, I want to be prepared for all three days.

I’m curious… what are the must-have items on your hospital packing list?

Hospital Bag Packing List

Hospital Bag Packing List

To download a printable version of theĀ Hospital Packing List, click here.

24 weeks and a baby name

It’s been a while since I’ve posted a pregnancy update, so I thought I’d do one now that I’m 24 weeks. My glucose test is next week. My belly and our baby boy are growing rapidly! This pregnancy is rolling along.

photo (2)

I’ve been feeling really good. I’m sore and my legs and hips get tired toward the end of the day. I have a lot of energy during the day, but I fall asleep around 9:30 every night, which is incredibly early for me. Todd and I are night owls and love staying up late watching TV. I fall asleep on the couch almost every night.

I’m sleeping well for the most part. Changing positions is getting to be a challenge, and Todd says I’m snoring now. Whoops. But I do feel rested. Baby boy seems to wake up every morning right when I open my eyes, and then he starts moving all around. (Or maybe it’s his movement that wakes me up and I just can’t really tell.)

I don’t have any specific cravings. I do like sweets, but they leave the worst taste in my mouth after I eat something. I love cheese and I love meat. But no real consistent cravings.

Hudson and Hayes are incredibly excited and talk about the baby all the time. Hudson likes to talk to the baby, and he has been doing the funniest thing. He asks me to open my mouth wide so he can shout into my mouth and the sound travels down to the baby. It’s a very interesting thought process, but it also makes a lot of sense. Despite me telling him that he can talk straight at my belly, he still thinks it makes more sense to talk into my mouth. I just laugh every time!

We’ve officially decided on a name and I thought I’d announce it here. Coming up with a 3rd boy name wasn’t super easy, but we ultimately decided not to use another “H” name. I like a few other “H” names, but none of them seemed right. And I didn’t want to choose a name just because it started with a certain letter. I wanted a name with some meaning and really wanted to use family names again.

We love the name we’ve chosen, and it’s so fun to hear the kids say his name.

baby name

His name is James Walker and we plan to call him James Walker. I hadn’t really ever considered a double name for a boy, but I just loved it when we first said it. James was Todd’s maternal grandfather and Walker is my brother’s name, and my dad’s middle name.

So, we’re pretty excited about our little James Walker! Now we’re ready to start counting down until when we meet him.

Baby Boy Nursery Inspiration

Baby Boy Nursery Inspiration

Baby Boy Nursery Inspiration

I have been pinning nursery ideas like crazy and shopping around for unique pieces. (Are you following me on Pinterest?) It has been so much fun to start working on another nursery! When Hayes was born, we moved him into the nursery we decorated for Hudson and moved Hudson to a new big boy room. When we sold our old house, we sold the custom draperies that were in the nursery and I don’t have the crib bedding that Hayes and Hudson used anymore. But I still have all the furniture, which is a huge blessing. We’ll recover or slipcover our rocker and just touch up the paint on our changing table and crib. (Hudson and Hayes both chewed on the crib when they were teething!) We don’t need to get much at all!

But it has been fun to find new things to personalize the room like lamps and crib bedding, a pillow for the rocker, mobile, and the J.M. Barrie “Peter Pan” quote. I also have an antique trumeau mirror that I’m so excited to put over the changing table so baby boy can see himself in the mirror. I still can’t believe we’ll have a baby here again!

Hudson and Hayes’s nursery was bright and cheery and I loved it, but for our third baby boy I wanted to do something a little bit different and a little more my style. I want it to be calming and peaceful with sweet “baby” touches. I also plan to frame and hang some sweet newborn photos after he’s born.

Now we just need to get to work and get the room ready! I can’t wait!

Source List:

House of Belonging

Annie Selke Fabric Swatch


Peter Rabbit Collection

Pom Pom at Home Crib Bedding

Pom Pom at Home Bunny Comforter and Pillow

Bla Bla Kids Mobile


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