the woman who gave me life

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Sometimes you just don’t know where to start with words, so I’m just going to start and I may not stop for a while.

My mother, Karen Akin, passed away on December 1 at 10:10 p.m with my dad and me at her side holding her hand and praying with her.

In early June, after spending many weeks in our home off and on after James Walker’s birth and many weeks of beautiful, sweet memories, my mom had a scan and found out that the melanoma tumors had spread to the left frontal lobe of her brain. She had been diagnosed with melanoma in 2010. It was in the lymph nodes at the time of diagnosis. It metastasized in 2013 and continued to spread for the past two years.

When we found out about the tumors in the brain and in her bones, she decided that she would remain upbeat and she really didn’t want to tell anyone about it except for a few friends and family members. My mom didn’t want to talk about cancer all the time. She didn’t want everyone constantly asking her how she was feeling. She wanted to go on about life as usual- living and loving life without people feeling sorry for her. So we didn’t really share her news either until my dad posted about it on Facebook in October.

She and my dad spent an incredible ten days in a villa in Tuscany with dear friends in June. In July, we all went to Colorado to visit my brother, Walker and his girlfriend. When we were in Colorado, it was the very first time that we’d ever seen my mom show any signs or symptoms of cancer in nearly 6 years. She was nauseated, tired, and often frustrated and overwhelmed. We went to visit my cousin’s family in Alabama in August and noticed more symptoms of the brain tumors. But we had two wonderful vacations. So many incredible memories! Playing with the boys. Talking about what heaven will be like. Singing and laughing and remembering things from childhood.

In September, Todd and I went to Indiana for the Influence Conference and my mom and dad came to visit for a few days. More brain tumor symptoms- trouble forming thoughts, difficulty multi-tasking, difficulty getting around and she was generally just not herself. In October, Todd and I took all the boys to my parents’ house for a long weekend and it was more of the same- just worse.

Since June, her health was rapidly declining. But the loss of her personality and the woman that I know was the most heartbreaking part.

My mom is such a part of me. I’m used to calling multiple times a day just to tell a funny story. I’m used to making plans for our next visit. I’m used to calling on Friday mornings to discuss what happened on Scandal the night before. And she couldn’t talk on the phone or text anymore. And, gosh, I have been missing her for months. I feel lost without my best friend.

We began to specifically pray that she wouldn’t feel anxious and she wouldn’t feel pain. That a peace that passes all understanding would overwhelm her. We prayed that she would know just how loved she is.

We know that God’s ways are higher than our ways and that He has perfectly written His story and it included a plan for a beautiful life for my sweet mom. And for all of our lives.

Watching my dad so lovingly care for my mom is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. It’s real love in its most raw form. Having the incredible opportunity to hold my mom’s face in my hands and to tell her every reason I love her is a gift I didn’t take lightly, and my dad was able to do that every day for months. He held her, he cared for her, he prayed with her, and cherished her.

We’re experiencing every emotion possible. I can’t speak for my dad and my brother, but I’m heartbroken. I’m mad. I’m grateful. I’m hopeful. I’m in shock. I’m relieved that her pain is over. But I know I can speak for my whole family when I say that we’re so thankful. We trust the Lord and we know that He is good. He is merciful. He has provided us with so many gifts and we’ve seen so many blessings. We were given more than five precious years with her before we ever experienced any setbacks from cancer.

All of my babies got to be held and rocked and sung to by the most loving woman in the world. They know a KK that would do anything in the world to be with them.

I’ve learned from a woman who trusts God. A woman who has given all of herself to others. A woman dedicated to helping those that can’t help themselves.

A woman who saw a problem and fixed it. She would stop at nothing to fix a problem for someone or to provide an opportunity for someone. She loved people and wanted to help make things better for them.

She loved movies and committed to see every Oscar-nominated movie before the awards show every year. She loved music and would bust out in song- hymns, classic rock, show tunes, Lady Gaga and Adele. She loved it all. She loved to dance and would jump to her feet any time she heard “rock me mama like a wagon wheel.” She wanted Elton John to sing “Honky Cat” at her funeral. For two decades she maintained this wish. And we honored it on Monday at her service with a recording of “Honky Cat.”

She was a staunch Republican, incredibly conservative, but also full of compassion. She adopted a homeless couple. She ministered to lost women and was committed to rescuing women from sex trafficking. She was generous to a fault and would give someone anything they needed and would drop everything to serve you if she could. Even if she wasn’t feeling well that day.

Over the past month, my mom, dad, brother and I have read letters from countless friends who have been impacted by my mom’s presence in their lives. We’ve cried and laughed and we’ve been so thankful for these incredible people who want her to know how much she is loved. And when I think about what she’s done in my life…. I just don’t know where to start.

My mom. My best friend. She was my biggest fan and the woman who pushed me. Her influence in my life has shown me what complete trust in the Lord looks like. What bravery looks like. How to mother. How to love. What it looks like to be a good friend. She is the fabric of my life. She is all over everything I see and every breath I take. My mentor. My cheerleader. My coach. My dear dear mother. The orchestrater of all the fun. The creator of all the beautiful things in every room. She had the magic touch.

She had impeccable style and so much class, but also so much sass and the ability to sit and relate to anyone without offering any nonsense. Just grace and truth and so much love for everyone she loved.

We’ve joked that she’d be saying to us, “Oh, just get over it already!” She would. She was a dust yourself off and get on with it kind of woman. But the loss we’re experiencing is immeasurable. She lit up a room. She held everyone’s attention without asking for it.

Sometimes just hearing her voice on the phone on a bad day just turned me into a puddle of tears. The comfort she provided just by knowing she loved me was all the comfort I needed. We’d schedule visits with each other before another was over. Many days now I can’t catch my breath as I imagine this life without her.

My brother, Walker, loved her dearly and she would have done anything for him. And my dad. Oh my dad. She was his best friend and he was hers. He cherished her right up until her very last breath. The example of marriage that they have set for me is amazing.

She adored Todd, and was always saying how lucky we all are to have him in our family. (I often joked that she grew to love Todd more than she loved me!) We know she’s with us. In our actions, in our words, in the songs we sing. Gosh, she’s even there when I look in the mirror now and see so much of her in me.

When I think about what she would want you to know and what she’d want me to share, it’s this. My mama was not perfect. She was precious and she changed lives, but she wasn’t perfect. She is not the hero of this story. She was a woman who was saved by grace through faith in Jesus. She loved her heavenly Father. She wanted a deeper relationship with Him. She wanted to show the love of Christ to those in her life. Jesus in her is the hero of this story. She would want you to know that and she’d want you to draw nearer to Him. To trust Him and let Him take the reigns.

And that’s what we’re doing. We’re leaning into our Savior, letting Him carry us, and not wasting a single minute that we have to tell anyone about the Good News in our lives. We’re experiencing incredible sorrow and unspeakable joy. The joy of the Lord is our strength. He is good!

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Comments

  1. says

    I’m so, so sorry Erin. What you wrote about your mom was just beautiful. What an amazing legacy she’s given to you and your family. I’ll be praying for y’all daily. May you experience His comfort, peace, and joy as you celebrate the hope of Jesus this season.

  2. Cammie says

    Thank you for this. What a powerful and touching testament to a wonderful woman. So many prayers for your family. Much love.

  3. says

    I Cried along with you reading your words.
    What an incredible legacy.
    “The Lord binds the brokenhearted and heals their wounds.”
    Thank you for sharing her story. I will continue praying for you!

  4. says

    Oh Erin. It’s rare for me to be moved to tears, but I cried reading this entire post. It’s so obvious from all the years I’ve read your blog and known you how close your family is and how much you love your Mom. Though my heart aches (as I know yours does) at the thought of the years to come without her, I am praising Him for the years you had together, the time she had with your boys, the person she helped you become, and all of the sweet memories your family has. Sending so much love your way!

  5. Karey says

    I can not imagine the pain of the loss of your mother,your best friend, has brought. Please know I love you! I hope these scriptures will be something you can cling to in the tough days ahead.

    Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

    Psalm 18:2 “The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”

    Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”

    Praying for you when the Lord brings your family to mind.
    Karey

  6. Kristin says

    Oh Erin. How my heart aches for your pain and simultaneously rejoices for your mama and her healed self dancing with Jesus to Wagon Wheels on the streets of heaven. If I know anything, I know that your mama is so very proud of the woman that you are–as a daughter of the most high, a wife, a mama and friend to many (among many amazing roles that you play). Grateful for all the memories and the last 6 months you got to spend with your family. Grateful for your grace and compassion handling something that hits so close to my heart. Sending love and prayers to you and your family.

  7. Jennifer says

    May God bless you and watch over your whole family just as your mom will do, as well. You were a wonderful daughter and she was just as blessed.

  8. Holly says

    Wow! What an amazing tribute. What an amazing legacy she has left. I hope you find peace for I know that it takes a long time to get over losing your mama! Hugs

  9. April says

    I am at a loss of words for I cannot imagine the pain of losing my mother but my eyes are filled with tears for you. I pray for the Lord’s comfort and peace to you and your family as you find your way through the days to come.

  10. Sherry says

    Your a beautiful writer and person Erin. Thank you so much for your reaching out. I am just still so saddened and darn right missing me my K. I don’t even know when or how but I am hoping someday in the future I will be able to speak to you, Erin. My best of love and prayers always. She was and still is my BIGGEST HERO.

  11. says

    Erin I don’t know you personally but I’ve read your blog for years and years and years, and I just KNOW with all my heart these words would have made your mom immeasurably proud. Your honesty and openness let all of us have such a clear picture of the wonderful woman she was and her goodness will live on forever. I am so sorry for your pain and your loss. Your family is in my prayers.

  12. says

    My sincere prayers and condolences as you navigate the days, weeks, and months ahead with out your mama by your side cheering you on! May you feel the strength of the Lord holding you up when you think you can not move forward, the joy of the Lord as you remember who she was, and may you be ever reminded of the gift of our Saviour and the reminder of how wonderful eternity will be! Be blessed.

  13. Jen L. says

    Beautifully written Erin. I lost my mom/best friend 6 years ago. It is still hard and there are days that I want to pick up the phone and call her and tell her something funny about my boys. I so admire your faith in Jesus as I didn’t that have that when my mom died. Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers.

  14. Jennifer says

    Erin…

    I don’t know you but have followed your blog for about 3 years now.
    What a beautiful tribute to your mother, it left me in tears.
    It has been 6 years since I lost my best friend, my dad, to cancer.
    However, I know he is better place rejoicing with Jesus and that makes the ache I have of missing him a little better. I am so sorry for the loss of your mother. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

  15. Jennifer M says

    Oh, Erin. I’m so sorry for your loss and I’m now bawling like a baby reading all of this. What a wonderful legacy your mother leaves, and this is such a beautiful tribute to her. I’m thinking and praying for your family in this time. I send you all the virtual hugs.

  16. Lyndsey Burton says

    I had tears streaming down my face the entire time I read this. So beautiful and gives the most amazing description of who your incredible mother was for those of us who were not lucky enough to have known her personally. I know your heart is aching for your best friend and your sounding board right now. She is with you…she is where you came from and one day, in God’s time, she is where you are going. You will continue to make her proud every single day – there is no doubt about that. She may have a different viewpoint now, but she’ll continue to be woven into the fabric of you and your family forever and ever. I pray for strength and comfort for you, your Dad, your brother and the rest of your precious family in the days ahead.

  17. Britt says

    I am so very sorry for your loss. This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read. I’ve been following your blog since Hudson was a baby and I always loved the fondness with which you talked about your mother. My own mother sounds so much like her- compassionate, beautiful, giving, funny, stylish, etc, etc. After her death in 2004, I often joked that she too, would’ve said, stop crying, and dust yourself off! I’m grateful for the love and grace of Jesus and that He promises we will be together again, and what a glorious day that will be. I will pray for you!

  18. Jennifer says

    I am so truly sorry for your loss. You beautiful post brought me to tears. You are stronger than I could imagine being in this situation.

  19. says

    You’ve been on my mind for the past few days! Thinking of you and your family in this tough time. Praying for your peace of mind. <3 Let me know if you need to chat or anything friend.

    India

  20. Pam Douglas says

    Erin, I have followed you for years. I discovered your blog by accident. I too have a daughter named Erin who is my best friend. I shared your blog w/ her and we have both been devoted to and captivated by your life. We have a relationship like you and your Mom had. I think that is one of the things that drew me to you.
    My heart is breaking for you. Erin and I both are praying for you and your family. You are such a perfect example of a daughter well raised. Both of your parents must be so proud of you.
    The road ahead is going to be very hard. You are such an amazing woman with such strong faith, I know God will help you through this. But, that’s the hard thing…you’ve got to get through it. Those precious boys will bring you so much joy…hang in there…there are so many of us praying for you.
    You have honored your Mother beautifully. Well done Erin.

  21. Ashley Cueto says

    Oh Erin…my heart just breaks for you & your sweet family. You were one of the very first blogs I started reading years ago. I feel like I know you personally! Your tribute to your beautiful mother was so moving & touching. I know with your faith, you will get through this most difficult period of your life. What a blessing for you to have always known The Lord – to be shown what that looks like as it was exemplified by your mother. I will keep you in my prayers. Big hugs, Ashley C.

  22. Toni :0) says

    My heart just broke for you. :0( I’m so incredibly sorry for your loss but what a legacy she has left. I was moved to tears with what you wrote, I pray for strength, comfort and peace during this most difficult time. You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers. Hug those sweet babies, her spirit lives on in them. God bless.

  23. Jennifer says

    Wow!!! What a legacy your mom has created for your family. Thinking of you as you learn to navigate your new normal. What a special Mama you have and will hold again one day.

  24. Elizabeth says

    Erin,
    What a beautiful tribute you wrote for your lovely mom. I am so very sorry for your loss. I lost my sweet mom several years ago when I was 34. It’s a strange thing to officially be a grown-up and yet still feel so strongly that I need/want my mom. Initially, trying to process my mom’s passing felt like someone might as well be telling me that the sky was green, because that was how inconceivable it was that she was no longer physically with me. I write all this simply to say, I know what you are going through and understand, I imagine, a lot of what you are feeling. When I was in the early stages of grief, somehow it made me feel better to know that there were others who really knew what I was going through. My heart goes out to you and your family. Lord, be near.

  25. AEOT says

    What a fitting and beautiful tribute to your momma. I haven’t lived this yet, but I can feel how emotional this is from your amazing words. I certainly was weepy reading this. I have been praying from afar for your family- prayers for faith, for rememberence, for healing, and for the ability to still be able to celebrate with love this Christmas season.

  26. says

    I know that words offer little comfort, but I am really sorry for your loss. I have enjoyed reading about your family’s adventures and know how central your mother is to all of it. Take as much time getting through it as you can, and I say through it not over it on purpose. *hugs*

  27. Priscilla says

    I am going through a similar situation with my mother right now. Thank you for sharing sure beautiful words about your mother

  28. Aileen says

    Erin, I’m not a crier but I’m sitting here crying over your loss. I cannot imagine the pain that you’re going through losing your mom and best friend. I’ll be praying for you and your family.

  29. Cari says

    Erin, I’m so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful post about your mom. I am a long-term reader and please know that I am sending much love and prayer to you and your family. With love from New Hampshire, Cari.

  30. Jessica says

    Oh Erin, I am so so sorry. This was so beautifully written and I am so glad for the hope you share in Jesus. Praise him for his love, his comfort, his perfect plan in this imperfect world. Praise him for your mom and the amazing woman she is. I will be praying for you and your family!

  31. says

    This is a beautiful tribute of your mom. I don’t know either of you, but I do know this: Because of Christ’s work in your mom’s life and her commitment to live for Him, she has left a beautiful legacy that is clearly on display in you. May the Lord be your comfort and joy, even in the midst of great loss.

    Katherine

  32. Allison says

    This was just beautiful. What a special tribute to your mother. Your words poured out all of your love and sadness. How incredibly special that your mom was able to see and know all three of your babies, and that they will hold memories of their grandmother. These words, also, should be printed out and saved for your boys to read one day, so that they will never forget the legacy that she left for them through her love, her life, and her relationship with Jesus. I am so sorry for your loss- you can never replace a mother, but you can hold on to all the memories and moments you shared with her, and you can be comforted in seeing her spirit shine through your life and that of your three boys. Praying for comfort for you in the days ahead.

  33. Jackie says

    Erin, what a beautiful and fitting tribute to a remarkable woman. I am so sorry to hear this devastating news and my thoughts and prayers will be with you in the coming weeks. Take comfort in knowing that you were the apple of your mom’s eye. Whenever you think of her it means she is standing right next to you.
    With most sincere condolences coming to you from New England,
    Jackie

  34. Emily K. says

    What a beautiful tribute to your precious mom! I can’t begin to imagine the hurt you all are going through, but know that my thoughts and prayers have been and will continue to be with you and your family.

  35. says

    Erin,
    First I’d like to offer my condolences to and your loved ones. I lost my dear sweet mother to alzheimers in February and my dad in June from COPD. It’s such a crushing pain to lose your mother. I just wanted to say I’ve read your blog for years and you are a very awesome woman, so I can imagine how awesome your mother was. I know your strong faith will be a part of your healing. I myself am struggling in that department. Your words are very helpful, I appreciate that you shared this. I am seeing a grief counselor to help me process these great losses. If you have an spiritual advice that you can post as time goes I would love to read it. Peace be with you during this tough time.
    Sara

  36. Maggie Dickinson says

    What a beautiful tribute this is to your mom. I have always enjoyed your blog and loved reading about your family. I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you peace in this time of sorrow.

  37. says

    Sending you all the hugs. I lost my dad 15 days before, completely unexpectedly, and you just put into words the things I haven’t yet been able to articulate. I am so very grateful you had that time, those moments, and the memories of these past few months to carry you through these tough times. All the prayers. All the hugs. All the love to you and your sweet family.

  38. Abbey says

    What a great post honoring your mom! Ive been following your blog since you were planning your wedding and I will be thinking about and praying for you and your family.

  39. Emily says

    Oh, Erin, I am so very sorry. What a tribute to your dear mother. It was one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. I have been reading your blog forever…I was pregnant with my oldest son when you were pregnant with Hudson. I know how much your mother meant to you and my heart breaks for you. Sending you prayers for peace and strength.

  40. Michelle says

    What an amazing tribute to your precious mom. I know she would be in tears reading this…just so absolutely proud of her beautiful daughter. Please know that while you’ve had your whole life to learn from your mom, you just gave so many others a gift by writing this post. I want to be the kind of mother you just described. I will be thinking of you and your family often as you celebrate this first Christmas without her…it will be so so hard. I hope you feel the prayers from so many…praying for you Erin!

  41. Courtney H. says

    I’m so very sorry for the loss of your sweet mother. I can’t imagine what your family has been through. Praying and sending hugs.

  42. says

    So very sorry for your loss. It’s been almost 18 years since my Mom silently and unexpectedly moved to Heaven. The youngest of our 4 children was just 2 years old, and now he’s a freshman in college. Hard to believe all the time that has passed…all the memories we’ve made without her. I miss my Mom every day…you will miss yours every day, too.

  43. says

    Erin, my heart just breaks reading this. I’ve been reading your blog since right before you got married and it was always obvious how close you were to your mom. I can’t imagine losing my mom… the thought paralyzes me…. so, all I can do is pray for you in this loss. This was a beautiful tribute and I’m sure your mother is smiling from Heaven.

  44. Kym says

    My most heartfelt condolences go out to you and all of your family. I have always admired the way that you spoke of your mom and the relationship that you have. Please know that while many of us do not know you personally we cheer through the great happenings and truly mourn for you all now. I know that you are steeped in your love for Jesus and wont quote scripture as I’m sure that you have His word engraved in your heart, just know that we are thinking of you and your family at this time. Take good care. Thank God for the memories that you were able to create and can now remember forever.

  45. Candace says

    My heart just breaks for your family. I cant imagine what y’all are going through, but you have been in my thoughts and prayers. Your mother was an incredible woman.

  46. Karen says

    Erin and family,
    My heart is breaking for all of you. I lost my mom to Alzheimers so I know a bit about the gradual loss that robs us of the special wonderful relationship between a mother and daughter. You are such a beautiful tribute to her and she is in everything you do for all of your loved ones. I will keep you in my prayers.

  47. says

    What a beautiful tribute to your mother. My thoughts are with you as you walk through this difficult time in your life. May you find comfort in your memories.

  48. Melanie says

    What a beautiful tribute. These words are some of the most beautiful words I have ever read, anywhere. You are blessed beyond measure with what both God and your mom created in you. God bless you and your dad in your grief.

  49. Dina says

    What a beautiful, eloquent, and dearly genuine tribute about your sweet mom. I wish I were as strong as you, to sit down and write all about my mom, my best friend, who I lost to metastatic melanoma to the brain in June, after being diagnosed 10 weeks beforehand. You are an inspiration to me, thank you so very much, praying for you and your family for peace and comfort. (I don’t know if you’ve followed on FB Praying for Molly Rossell, but she just lost her battle with metastatic melanoma to the liver, on Saturday and was the sister of a church friend of mine, so very tragic).

  50. Neila Stone says

    I never post on blogs, but this just moved me tears. How blessed you were with such a wonderful mother. You will be in my prayers.

  51. Laurie says

    Dear Erin,

    I am so deeply sorry to read about your mother’s passing. For the past couple of years, I have been reading your blog and being inspired by the closeness you seemed to share with her. Last year, I had a very close call and almost lost my mother, and miraculously she recovered. The feeling that I could lose her cut me to the core, yet I didn’t lose her. So with that, I cannot begin to imagine what your are going through — facing the reality of her being gone. I wish you strength as you move through this difficult time. I’m glad you have the memories of those family trips this year.

    It seems as if she was a wonderful role model to you in the way you are raising your three precious boys.

    Blessings,
    Laurie from the west coast.

  52. Kim says

    I am so sorry for your loss! Your words and thoughts are beautifully written, and the love you had for your mother and family shine through.

  53. Keisha Dawson says

    What a beautiful legacy your precious mama left for you and your family. The words you have written about her are so special. Continuing to lift each of you in prayer!

  54. Janice says

    Hi Erin, Just read your beautiful tribute about yourMom my heart is broken for you! I have followed your blog for a while and wanted you to know I will have you in my prayers! I lost my Mom eight years ago and I miss her more everyday!

  55. Kristen says

    Your mom sounds amazing. This was a beautiful tribute to her. I’m so very sorry and pray you continue to trust the Lord to comfort and uphold you!

  56. Kim says

    Erin, This remembrance of your Mom is truly beautiful! I lost my Dad in June so I understand how you’re feeling. There are so many moments that it just takes my breath away. I read somewhere that “with great loss means there was great love”. I have always loved following your family and I know your Mother was with you every step of the way. She will now be with you in your heart. Praying for you your brother and father. Kim

  57. kristin says

    Hi Erin – So sorry about your mother – I have been following your blog for years and am so sorry to hear this news. But what an absolutely beautiful tribute to your mother – your words filled me with joy and brought me to tears. God bless you all.

    Kristin

  58. says

    Sweet sweet girl . Your mother raised a beautiful strong and sensitive woman in you. She is immeasurably proud of you and will continue to watch over you and guide you. I pray for your comfort and peace and for you to continue to be blessed by your beautiful mother’s legacy. Sending you the biggest hug xoxoxoxo landlocked mermaid tricia xoxxo

  59. Eve says

    Through your beautiful words, your pride in the wonderful woman she was, and the sadness in your devastating loss shine through perfectly. I am so, so very sorry to hear she passed on. You, your brother, and your beautiful boys are huge part of the legacy she leaves. Sending thoughts and prayers your way as you navigate the hard times ahead. She is always with you. <3

  60. Abbie says

    Erin, a long time reader here…what a wonderful tribute to your mother. As I sat reading this with my baby in my arms, I had tears in my eyes. Your mother was blessed to have you. You have my sympathy.

  61. says

    I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. My son, Jarrett, died of melanoma almost ten years ago. He had just turned seventeen.

    Losing someone you love so much is incredibly hard. Prayers for you and your family-

    Instagram:
    michellebostonsheehan
    and
    east_tugalo_design

  62. says

    I am so terribly sorry to hear of your loss. I found your blog via Kelly’s Corner. I just kind of happened upon it. I can’t say I know what you’re going through but I can say that I said a prayer for you tonight. I don’t know what it is to lose a parent, but I lost both grandparents and a sister to this terrible disease. My dad also was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer in August of 2014. By the grace of God he is still here but it’s a daily battle! Stay Beautiful!
    Dawn

  63. Linda Miller says

    Dear Erin,
    Been following you and your blog for many years.
    I remember when your mother was first diagnosed.
    We were the same age.
    I am so sorry for your tremendous loss.
    So very sad for you but must tell you that your tribute to her was beautiful.
    You were blessed to have her as your best friend and mother.
    Will keep you and your family in my prayers.

  64. Grace In says

    Hi Erin,
    I stopped by the blog for the first time in a while. Your memoir of your momma is beautiful. I am so blessed by this and can only hope to be as good of a momma to my kids!

  65. Jennifer says

    Your words are beautiful. They are exactly how I feel and what I would say about my own mom ~ and ultimately what I would want to be said of me too. It sounds like your memories of your mom will bring you great comfort and give you direction for you life. Thanks so much for sharing.

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