What do we do when the lack of white space is filled with good stuff? Really good stuff.
Trips to the park with friends.
Soccer practice. That is fun for everyone.
Nights out with other couples.
The greatest outfit you ever tried on… and it was on sale!
Toys for the kids that were exactly what they wanted and put the biggest smiles on their faces.
Half-off books!
A set of gorgeous heirloom dishes that were passed down two generations.
Even your weekly Bible study.
None of those things are “bad” things. They’re all actually good things.
But, for me, they can become white space stealers. It all depends on how they make me feel.
A closet full of great outfits that were on sale isn’t so bad, but when I think about how many items were never worn and how much money was spent, I don’t feel good about it.
Soccer practice is great when I saw my boy smiling and running around with his friends. But then we’re rushing to eat supper and Hayes is crying and it can really mess up the rest of our night.
A trip to the park with friends is always a good idea. We get out of the house and get to run around. But when I find myself saying to my boys, “Hurry up. Get it in the car. We have to hurry,” I know that it wasn’t a good thing. All the hurrying we do steals my white space.
And even on those mornings when we’re rushing off to school so I can get to Bible study on time, I miss a lot of the joy. I want to be at Bible study, but the rushing around and hustling my boys along leaves such a bad taste in my mouth.
None of these things are bad. But if doing it all makes me feel anxious, it’s probably not good for right now.
I like to say yes. We’ve covered that.
But I don’t like rushing around. I don’t like looking at my precious, cheery little 2-year-old and asking him to hurry up.
I don’t like looking around and seeing every surface covered with toys, books, frames, and magazines.
It’s all just too much.
Too much good stuff.
And that just means it’s just not good for us for right now.
This week I’ll be talking about some of the things that we love that need to be reevaluated to give us back our white space.
What good things do you have in your schedule, home, or life that are stealing your white space that you’d like to reclaim?
This post is Day 14 in a series called 31 Days of Creating White Space.
Rushing too much always leaves such a bad taste in my mouth, too. There are so many things that I love but have to rush to squeeze in. It’s been hard for me to learn how to say no. I can’t wait to hear about what y’all have re-evaluated
It’s just hard for me to enjoy anything when I’m rushing. And, no lie, something bad always happens when I’m rushing like that… Falling down, stepping in a puddle, getting a speeding ticket, forgetting something. It’s just not good for me.
Well I’ve already mentioned before that in this season of life with a 3 year old and a 2 month old, we’ve had to give up our mid-week Bible study. It’s just too much rushing and breaking of our nightly routine. I know that one day we will get back to it but that time is not now. My main worry though is that I am letting someone else down by not being there even though I know that if I was there I would be so busy wrangling kids that I would not even hear the message or get to converse with other members. I also worry about what message it’s sending my oldest son that we are choosing not to go. Sometimes I know he overhears us discussing whether to go or not. I don’t want to give him the idea that church is something that can be tossed to the backburner because it’s not important because we truly do WANT to go but it’s sometimes so hard. I think I am just going to have to pray a lot for guidance on this one.
It’s so hard. I’m thinking about switching bible studies to a different time that just works better for our morning schedule. Thank you for sharing your experiences with me.
I hear ya on the asking your 2 yr old to hurry up- I’m guilty as charged. 🙁 I think the key to choosing which things to say yes to and which things to say no to is really our ongoing communication with the Holy Spirit. I’m trying to make a habit of never committing to something without first talking it over with my husband and taking a little while to pray about it. It might seem weird to friends for me to always say, “let me get back to you about that,” but it allows me time to process it and really think more intentionally about it and ask the Lord if it’s something we should be doing. And I also am working on not always giving a reason for declining things. I tend to feel like I need to give our “reason” when it’s really not always necessary. This has been such a great series and so thought-provoking!! Thanks for sharing! 🙂
I love that. There’s no need to rush with a yes response. I’m guilty of doing that.
I love this post! I have trouble cutting stuff out that’s “good stuff.” I did a huge closet purge this weekend and it FELT GREAT! Still had trouble letting go of things that were fairly new and expensive, but I’m not sorry one bit! A couple dresses had been worn once and been sitting for over 10 years! Hubby and I also talked about a new class we are taking that has made Sundays feel very rushed. We are going to continue it through Christmas since we committed, but then we are going to hang it up for now. Children’s Choir and Sunday night service is wonderful. But between church and family responsibilities, that is leaving us 2 hours total at home on the “Sabbath.” That’s not going to work for our family in this season. Sunday needs to be a day we get to worship with fellow believers and then have relaxed family time at home in the evening. So that’s a White Space robber right now. I don’t want to rush rush rush at a time where I’m struggling to get to know my boys and find out the best way to do life daily with them. Barking commands is not what I want them to remember about their mama during their childhood. Thanks, Erin!
I love love love this series…and thank you for today’s scripture!!! Why does it always seem to be the right one for the right moment?!?!?! He’s good that way, yes? 🙂
Ha! Yes… That always seems to happen to me. The right Word just pops up at the right time. Thank you, Cassie!
You are doing a wonderful job in this series. I was blog hopping last night and a blogger is doing a series on her closet. She has 50 wooden hangers and everything has to fit on those hangers. Something new comes in then something old goes out. Period. It puts those “best outfit ever” times into perspective.
Also, I truly understand what you mean about hurrying your small child. I am 51 with a 23 year old. My generation tried to make it so easy on our children that we did everything for them. Life completely revolved around them and many young adults are not equipped for being told no, taking responsibility for their actions, budgeting, etc. While I completely understand where you are coming from, I just want to gently remind you – and as April touched on – we must think about what our actions and words indicate to our children and their future. “Hurrying” by yelling is obviously wrong — but let’s face it — some kids won’t be hurried even if it something they want to do! Learning to allow three extra minutes to get that seam in the toe of his sock exactly right so it didn’t rub in his shoe is still fresh on my mind….!
Keep it up girl!
Hi Erin, I don’t comment very much, but I love your blog and especially this series! Thank you for being so open and for sharing your words (and His Words!) with all of us.
So well said Erin! We are in the same boat (and don’t even have that many activities!) I appreciate your wording in that if it brings you such anxiety, it might not be a good thing right now. Agree!
So well written. This kind of goes along with the post I wrote today about how books were stealing away from my white space. I have been following your series and trying to apply it to my life and something you wrote last Wednesday really nailed it right on the head for me that I ended up redoing and revamping something I really love this weekend. You’re such an inspiration to me and I’m so glad that this change is creating more white space in my life…my husband thank you too by the way!
Here’s the link if you’re interested in reading it 🙂
http://lovethecampbellsblog.blogspot.com/2013/10/dont-steal-my-breathing-room.html
Oh wow…. I am just now reading all of your 31 days posts. This one really spoke to me. I am my worst self when we are rushed and hurrying. I may only have one thing on my schedule, but if I’m rushing to do it, it puts me in a bad mood — which I transfer to my boys. Thank you so much for writing this series. it is just what I needed to hear in this season of life. I want to slow down and be a fun mom. I want to sit in the floor and play Candyland with my kiddos. We may just do that tonight!