Wow vs. Why

Today’s post was written by my friend, and my Sunday school teacher’s wife, Nancy. It was published last week on her daughter’s CaringBridge site. Her daughter, Katie, was diagnosed last year with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. Katie is now 14 and is still battling this disease. Nancy is a beautiful writer and a loving mother. Katie is a tremendous fighter with incredible faith. And their whole family has brought so much glory to God through these circumstances. I encourage you to follow along with Katie’s story on their Caring Bridge site. 

But today I wanted to share this post with you because it brought me to tears last week at the airport and I found myself sharing it with everyone I knew. 

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“Everything happens for a reason.” Well, not really.

When people say this, they usually mean that God has a bigger plan than what we can understand at the moment. It is certainly true that God has “plans to prosper you and not to harm you” (Jeremiah 29:11), and He tells us that “my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” (Isaiah 55:9) Our lives absolutely have purpose. But, I think this old adage is an incorrect perspective. The Bible states, “There is a time for everything” (Ecclesiastes 3:3), but nowhere does it say directly that everything happens for a reason.

Sometimes when bad things happen, they are a consequence of our sinful behavior. And usually, we are well aware of this when it occurs. Discipline is not very effective if we don’t know the connection! And when God chose to judge entire nations with weather disasters, disease, or some sort of plague, He generally sent His prophets to give warnings, which clarified that the causes were a lack of repentance. But the Lord is incredibly merciful. Most of the time we do not receive the consequences and discipline we deserve! I saw a quote recently from R.C. Sproul, Jr. “Why do bad things happen to good people? That only happened once. And he volunteered.” The Lord is indescribably patient, too. His wrath is reserved for repeated and ongoing rejection of the Holy Spirit’s conviction, and repeated and ongoing refusal to repent. “But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.” (2 Peter 3:8-9).

More times than not, we experience difficulties (or weather disasters or disease, etc.) because they are just natural occurrences of living in a fallen world. God sometimes chooses to supernaturally intervene to protect us from hardships and trouble. I had a very concrete example of this just last week.

As I was driving on my way to Anna Caroline’s first ever football game as a cheerleader, I accidentally cut a corner too tight and hit a curb, hard. I remember thinking, “Oh no, that sounded bad. I need to check for damage.” I arrived at the school, forgetting all about the possible damage in my excitement to get to the stands and support my daughter.

After her game, we were in a rush to join our family at the Gamecock football game, already underway. But it was really hot that day, and we were so thirsty that I decided to stop at a gas station to get us both a drink. As I returned to the car, juggling two drinks and my wallet, I dropped my Powerade as I reached to open my door. It rolled all the way under the car so that I had to walk around to the passenger side to retrieve it. The bottle landed against the rear tire…the one with which I had hit that curb. And there, right in front of me, impossible to miss, was a big blister on the sidewall of my tire!

I was able to get safely back to the school where two kind men changed my tire for me. The next day when I went to get a new tire, the mechanic told Rett that if I had kept driving on that tire, it would have surely blown out any minute! There is no doubt at all in my mind that that was God’s protection and providence, pure and simple.

But even when He does not choose to miraculously intervene, the Lord ALWAYS prepares and equips us. He is omniscient, which means He knows everything that is going to happen ahead of time, so He always knows what we need to be prepared to face. After a traumatic event or situation occurs, we can often see how His hand was moving and working in preparation, sometimes for years or a lifetime prior, as in the case of Katie’s illness, or sometimes for just a few moments, as in the case of my damaged tire. But that is very different than causing something to happen “for a reason,” which is what the oft quoted phrase implies. (I realize I am teetering dangerously on the edge of the predestination doctrine…but please try to just let that “sit” for now!)

In our humanness, we want to ask the question “Why?” and we long for an answer.

Many well-meaning Christians, myself included, will offer encouragement to each other by saying, “We may never know why in this life.” But I boldly propose that there may not BE a reason at all! Some things just happen as part of being alive, period. The better question to ask is, “Now that this (fill-in-the-blank) has happened, what is God doing? How is He working?”

Every Christian, and most everyone in general, has heard the phrase, “All things work together for good to them that love God.” But unlike “Everything happens for a reason,” which is not found anywhere in the Bible, this phrase really IS from the Scriptures! It is found in Romans 8:28 and it is one of those verses that we learn in church from childhood, right up there beside John 3:16 (“For God so loved the world…”). But there is much, much more to this verse than the trite Band-Aid that it sometimes seems to have become in Christian circles.

We must consider the 8th chapter of Romans in its entirety to fully understand the context and meaning of this 28th verse. This chapter is also where other gems are found, like,

“Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (v. 1)

“For you have not received a spirit of fear,” (v. 15)

“For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed in us.” (v.18)

“In the same way, the Spirit also helps our weakness, for we do not know how to pray as we should, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” (v. 26)

“If God is for us, who is against us?” (v. 31)

And finally, the chapter ends with the familiar comforting passage,
“But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (v. 37-39).

Wow. We could spend months, maybe years, delving into the depths of this chapter. These verses just skim the surface! The book of Romans is definitely meat, not milk! But for now let’s consider the discussion of suffering.

If we focus on the pain, we do so in our flesh. Because that is where we are hurting! But this leads us to an attitude of negativity and complaints–a type of spiritual death as we are more concerned about the here and now than the eternal. We have all known folks who have become bitter from the assaults life has thrown their way. And this is the normal, natural thing to do! But we, as Christians, are often called to do the unnatural, which we can only accomplish if we are infused with supernatural strength from the Holy Spirit himself. “For the mind set on the flesh is death, but the mind set on the Spirit is life and peace.” (Rom 8:6). Now think of those folks who seem to move through unspeakable tragedies and trials with grace, peace, and even JOY?! And THAT is the glory to be revealed in us! (v. 18)

So what is the Lord doing during our storms? Well, just from Romans chapter 8, He:

*sets us free from the law of sin and death (the natural response) so that we can respond supernaturally! (v. 2)

*dwells in us (v. 9)

*gives us life and righteousness (v. 10)

*sustains our physical strength (v. 11)

*loves and claims us as His children (v. 15)

*testifies for us (v. 16)

*reveals His glory in us (v. 17-18)

*gives us the first fruits of the Spirit (v. 23)

*redeems and saves us, and gives us hope (v. 23-24)

*enables us to persevere, even in our weakness (v. 25-26)

*intercedes for us in prayer with intense compassion (v. 26-27, 34)

*causes all things to work together for good !!! (v. 28)

*gives our lives purpose (v. 28)

*conforms us to the image of His son (v. 29)

*conquers all the overwhelming things we are facing (v. 37)

*loves and comforts us with a love so strong and steadfast that NOTHING can separate us from His love! (v. 39)

Therefore, if we accept that God does not CAUSE our suffering for some ulterior motive, and we understand that God is actively helping us WHILE we are suffering, let’s look back at that treasured verse again…

“And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, who are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28

I truly believe that my heavenly, sovereign Father is always working for GOOD out of ANY situation. So, instead of allowing our flesh to focus on the pain, looking for reasons and answers to the “Why?” question, the real question is…

Will we seek the Spirit to reveal to us the good outcomes of our sufferings so that we don’t miss them? Will we focus on the eternal things, or on the emotions of “death” that cry out from our flesh? And are those good outcomes the REASON for the suffering? NO!!

I think that is where we make the mistake. We are often privileged to see something good come out of our suffering, and in our human attempt to find the answer to, “Everything happens for a reason,” we deduce and assume that the good thing must be WHY God “sent” or “allowed” the storm. This is wrong!

The storm just happens. And then God does what He does by His very nature: GOOD. Especially when you consider that LOTS of good things often happen in every bad situation. But if you follow the logic of “Everything happens for a reason,” then WHICH ONE was the reason? Can there be more than one reason? I guess. But the better explanation is that the number of things God can do to bring beauty from ashes is infinite! He can do anything!

So whenever a storm crashes into your life (big or small!)…instead of dutifully looking for something good to come out of it, and turning that into “the reason” for the pain, we should look expectantly for ALL of the good things that God is going to do, and be in awe of how many there are.

We should be thankful that we are His vessel, and excited about the ways we can participate in sharing His goodness with the world through our journey. That is where we find the peace and yes, even the JOY! as we face “the sufferings of this present time” and experience His Glory revealed in us!

Say WOW vs. WHY!