the Him in her

Envy is a weird thing.

Somedays I find myself completely at peace with where I am. Content with my living situation. Content with my family life. Content with my job status and not feeling overwhelmed with a need for possessions. Content with the direction my blog has taken and how that affects my daily life.

And then other days, I find myself listening to the lies of the enemy.

I see other successful, beautiful daughters of the Lord with different talents than mine. They’re being asked to do bigger things than I am. Their opportunities are more important and get more recognition and so they must just be “better” than I am.

They could be asked to serve in a specific way at church or be honored with a prestigious award. Maybe they never falter or get nervous and are always asked to speak at events and minister to a crowd. Or they get picked to partner with an amazing brand or they get picked to go on TV because their blog post went viral.

And the enemy lies to me and tells me that her purpose is more important than my purpose.

(Yes, I’m still soaking up every life-giving word in A Beautiful Purpose by Susie Larson. And I’m loving it.)

So when I get fed those lies, I question myself. What could I be doing differently? What should I change about what I’m doing? And then the enemy occasionally sends me to an ugly place and jealousy takes over. I don’t just beat myself up, but I start to critique the person who has been blessed with these gifts that I wish were mine.

“What has she done that’s any different than what I’ve done?”

In A Beautiful Purpose, I came across this one little line that said that when Susie Larson started to feel that way, she heard God say to her, “Can you honor the Me in her?”

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(p. 43, A Beautiful Purpose)

And wow, y’all.

These women are my sisters in Christ. God loves them just like He loves me. And my talents and gifts may not be the same or as recognizable or as public as someone else’s, but they are important. They are there. I was blessed with talents and gifts and I just use them differently than the woman with all the recognition. And God is opening doors every single day for us to use the gifts He has given us.

It’s not her fault. She loves the Lord just like I do.

And when I can take a step back and remember that the things I do, the talents I use, and the gifts I share should be used for His glory, I can stop thinking about myself and start being happy for her.

I can use my talents to the best of my ability, glorify God through my talents, and stop wishing for her talents!

Then I can support her, and pray for her, and honor the Him in her.

(*If any of this is also on your heart, I strongly encourage you to read A Beautiful Purpose by Susie Larson.)


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  1. Cheryl says


    You have no idea just how close to home this hits. I suffer the same struggles more often that I like to admit….all the while knowing I’m incredibly blessed and that I’m living and working just as He intended. Thank you for taking time to compose such a well thought and well meaning post. I intend to bookmark and revisit it often…easily once a week if I’m honest. 🙂

  2. says

    What an amazing post! Thank you so much for opening and sharing your heart and your struggle!! I admit that this is a trap the enemy uses on me as well and its tough sometimes to shut it down! I love the idea of honoring the Him in her. This was so encouraging to me today ~ thanks!

  3. Emmelie says

    I struggle with this, too, Erin. Thanks for writing this post. I can always use a fresh perspective or reminder on this topic.

    I was recently at a women’s church retreat where the issue of comparison/envy was addressed. The speaker likened it to David when he was about to fight Goliath. Saul had given David his own armor to wear, and David refused it. Now every time I feel the tug of jealousy or shame of comparison to a fellow sister, I try to remember that their “armor” isn’t my armor. I just loved that illustration!

  4. says

    Sometimes you read something that you know will always stick with you. This is one of those things for me. Thank you for sharing..I’ll have to find this book!

  5. says

    You minister to women all across America through this blog and through posts just like this one. Don’t stop sharing what He’s doing in your heart and life…you’re a blessing to me and to so many.


  6. says

    I totally relate with this also. Thanks for your honesty. I think many women struggle with this. I know I do. I see ladies at our church that are so gifted and I feel often that I don’t have any gifts at all and I’m the pastor’s wife. lol Blessings on you for helping so many!

  7. says

    Erin, this is absolutely beautiful. And so relevant in the competitive culture we women have been raised in – it’s as if we are just taught to compete with one another from the beginning instead of learning to be happy for one another and celebrate each other’s achievements. I too sometimes wonder why my purpose seems to be so ‘insignificant.’ But then I have to remind myself that what may seem insignificant by the world’s standards (being a good mother, being a good friend, being a good wife), is not insignificant in God’s eyes or in the lives of the ones that I love. And that’s all that matters! Thank you for reminding me of this today!:)

  8. says

    WOW… This post just spoke to my heart in a bazillion ways! I am blown and away and I’m going to order that book from Amazon immediately.

    I completely agree with you on envy. Some days, it appears nonexistent. Other days, you can’t escape it. I’m so thankful that God called you to share this on your blog, Erin… And I’m so glad that you were obedient in that calling. What a wonderful way to encourage and let us know that we’re not alone!

    Thankful, thankful, thankful for you!

  9. says

    Oh my word Erin, this post is SO spot on for me. I think with ALL of the social media and peeks into people’s world it’s so easy for me (and others) to get caught up in measuring our homes/lives/children/outfits/vacations/parties/meals/striped straws, ha! against everyone else’s. I struggle with so many of the same things you mentioned… sounds like I need to get that book ASAP. I saw you post that snapshot the other day and those words ring so true on so many levels. Reminding myself to “honor the ME in “her” this week!” Thank you for sharing.

  10. says

    Thank you soooo much for sharing this!
    It’s exactly what I needed to hear today.
    Love your corner of the blog world.
    – Your newest #1 fan on bloglovin! 🙂

  11. says

    Erin, oh Erin, this post was spot on and everything I needed to read today and more!!! Thank you for this. Thank you for each word, from beginning to end!!!! WOW!!!! XO

  12. says

    You are such a great example of Christ. I love that you use your space to be real and set great examples for others on such topics.

  13. says

    learning to celebrate others and see the “HIM” in them is crucial, isn’t it?!
    Comparison REALLY is the thief of joy….
    we’ve all been in that place….it’s so yucky when that yuck in our flesh rears it’s head.

    love your heart in this post…your transparency is refreshing.

    wonderful meeting you today!

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