before Hudson met Hayes

Before Hayes was born, I had this overwhelming feeling of worry. But I was worried about Hudson. I was so worried that we were going to completely rock his world, and that our relationship with him would change.

I worried that he would be sad and feel left out and jealous. And, mostly, I was worried that he would instantly grow up more than I was prepared for him to grow up. To help him prepare for the baby’s arrival, we just talked about the baby a lot. We told him Hayes’s name, and we would pray for the baby every night before bed. I think that constantly talking about it helped prevent some of the surprise when Hayes was born.

We also took Hudson to the store so he could pick out a gift to give to Hayes in the hospital. He picked out a little stuffed animal, and was excited to give it to his baby brother.

My friend, Nina, sent Hudson a book called “I’m A Big Brother” and we read it every day, multiple times a day. And we continued to read it once Hayes was born. He loved looking at the pictures and talking about his new baby brother.

The weekend before Hayes was scheduled to arrive, we had a weekend of fun just for Hudson. We took him to his favorite places and just really had a great weekend celebrating him and soaking up our time with just our little family of three. We were thrilled to be welcoming Hayes, but we were very well aware of how much life would change.

But, goodness, all that worry was for nothing. Life wasn’t a cake walk after Hayes arrived, but the amount of love that our hearts can accommodate just grew and grew. There was no reason to be worried.

And in these first couple of weeks at home with Hayes and Hudson, my mom was there with me while Todd was at work. Having her there helped us divide and conquer, so that Hudson and Hayes were both being cared for at all times. I think the adjustment went really well, and our boys are getting closer and closer to becoming the very best friends.

How did you help prepare your child for a new sibling?

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  1. says

    This post is so timely. I’m due with my second two weeks from today and I’m feeling so anxious about what life is going to look like for my 2.5 year old son. A part of me is really grieving the loss of him being my only child and having my full attention. Even though I know one of the things I would have loved to have during my own childhood was a sibling, and today as an adult, I know that one day when I lose my mom, I’ll be the sole keeper of my memories and the sole bearer of that grief. I long for someone to share that with (of course, my husband will be supportive, but in a different way than a sibling would). So, I know what I’m giving him is a wonderful gift, and yet here on the cusp of opening it, I can’t help but feel rather anxious.

  2. Jeannie K says

    I was supposed to read this post today for sure! My husband and I just started trying for our second baby, and I have all the same worries you did. My husband is super supportive, but I don’t think he quite understands why I’m worried. So, thanks for posting this and letting me know it will be alright!

  3. says

    Can Hudson come help me prepare for my baby?! I might need a hug from that sweet little boy. I’m getting totally overwhelmed, but I think once we have the anatomy scan & I know our baby is safe I’ll be more calm. The hospital tour totally calmed Rob, but only raised my anxiety. I’ve signed us up for just about every baby class known to man now. Ha! Miss you & have a WONDERFUL trip! xoxo

  4. says

    We did much the same thing, Erin. I too was worried about Landon more than anything. But you’re right, your heart just expands and the new baby fits in like they were always there before 😉

  5. says

    We are not expecting our second yet, but I love how you helped prepare Hudson for the arrival of Hayes. Praying for him each night by name is a great idea!

  6. says

    I am due in 3 weeks with our second and feeling a bit of anxiety. Not so much about going from one to two (though I know it will rock my world) and we have been talking to Anne Margaret about being a big sister. She is excited. I am more worried about the actual going into labor part and making sure that my baby girl is taken care of while we are away. We have great friends and family that can be here in 2 hours but the thought of going into labor and trying to make sure that my little one is okay while I am out of commission is stressful! Ultimately, I know she will be fine and that I am worrying over nothing, but as her Mommy, its hard not to worry!

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