*I previously wrote Now That I’m a Mommy… This is similar to that.
It’s so easy to lose yourself to motherhood. In fact, it’s almost impossible not to lose yourself. The love for your children is so consuming that everything you do and every choice you make leads back to your kids and their needs. It’s pretty incredible!
But just because I’m a mommy…
…it doesn’t mean that I don’t long for just one day to sleep until 11:00 a.m. in my bed.
…it doesn’t mean that I should allow myself to become a tired-looking frump. Makeup never hurt anybody.
…it doesn’t mean that my sense of humor needs to fly out the window. Kids are supposed to make us laugh more!
…it doesn’t mean that I don’t have dreams of my own or things I’d like to accomplish. And yes, maybe I can even do some of those things while being a stay-at-home mom.
…it doesn’t mean that I don’t love a nice, silent car ride. By myself.
…it doesn’t mean that I have any idea what I’m doing when I find myself in new territory. Or old territory.
…it doesn’t mean that I’m nothing like I used to be. Motherhood has certainly changed me in major ways. But I’m still myself.
…it doesn’t mean that I don’t crave days spent with girl friends or a nice, quiet afternoon in a movie theater.
…it doesn’t mean that I have all the answers or don’t need my own mommy on a daily basis.
…it doesn’t mean that I know how to be strong when my heart breaks and when I’d like to just take a time out and cry.
…it doesn’t mean that I became a domestic goddess overnight. I need a live-in Ina Garten!
…it doesn’t mean that I don’t lose my temper and behave the way my toddler behaves every once in a while.
I am a mommy. And I have a very large responsibility on my hands. There are a lot of really fun, superficial things about being a parent. There are a lot of not-so-fun, challenging things about being a parent.
The rewards trump both of these things, though. It’s not about cute nurseries and adorable matching outfits. And it’s not about tantrums in public that make you want to crawl into a hole and disappear.
It’s about what I’m expected to teach them. The things that will grow them into the people that I’ve asked God to help me with in raising them. And then finding out, in their time, what they’ve learned. It’s about seeing the sweet souls that they are and hearing from them just how much they love you when you tell them how much you love them.
So sweet and so true! Love the picture. Hudson looks like Ellie, always covered in stickers!
So true! I think as moms we give and give and give. My husband gets to go golf on a regular basis, but I need an outlet as well. I need to find one, even if it’s taking a book to Starbucks to get away for a bit.
Love this post, Erin! Completely agree! And what a cute picture of those sweet boys!
This post resonates with me. We will be expecting our baby boy in June, and I feel better knowing that being a mother is not all that I am. I really appreciate your honesty in this post. 🙂
Such a great post! I would love to have a morning in bed till 11am…totally undisturbed! Lol! But you’re so right getting to be a mommy outweighs everything else!
so, so true! it’s amazing how much just going to the grocery store alone and drinking starbucks while shopping is so enjoyable nowadays! 🙂
also very true about not getting lost in the superficial. it’s hard not to because baby stuff is so dern cute 😉 xo
Love this…especially that last paragraph.
This is so true! I was just talking to a mommy friend the other day about how little things like driving without anyone else in the car is a treat!
So true, Erin. I can relate to all of these.
Such a great post, Erin!
Thank you so much for this post. My daughter is four weeks old and I really needed to see this to know that what I’m feeling is also felt by other mommies. I always look forward to your posts in my Google Reader because I know there is some little tid-bit of information that you always pass on that is perfect for me to hear that day, whether it’s a scripture or an honest post like this. Thank you for being you 🙂
Perfect!!!!
I love your honesty in this post…thank you! I tell my own mama that I “eat my words” all the time!
I find that motherhood is a constant balancing act in every way imaginable. How to be a good/fun mom while still being firm/having boundaries. How to be a mom who’s completely “all it” while still knowing who “I” am aside from being a mom. Wanting to get away for a quiet weekend, aching to be with your hubby and kids while you’re away {or at least on the last day}.
Love this post.
This was heart-warming, Erin. And so very true. I cannot wait for the day to hear J say I love you!
So, so true. I’m just coming off a bad case of cabin fever (selphpartyof3.blogspot.com) from being couped up in my house with my boys for days on end. Ahhh. All the things you mentioned are still important and are still “necessary wants”… even for mamas.
Thanks for always writing things that we can all relate to!
I am so glad you are my friend! xoxo
All great thoughts, Erin. I love the stickers on Hudson’s shirt…we are in a big sticker phase over here too 🙂
LOVE them all especially about an occasional tantrum from the Mommy. HA! I do that too. Sometimes that is just what I need before moving on. Guess our toddlers are the same way!
Oh Eric, I love this post beyond any words, although I’ll try 😉 There are so many things that I heard from the “older” crew about becoming a mom while I was pregnant. They would say things like, oh you’ll never have time to go out again, you’ll never lose the weight, you’ll never have time to put on make up, you’ll never wear clean clothes again, you’ll never have time to concentrate on your career, you’ll never…well you get it. and you know what? I was SO UPSET! And you know what else? I DID ALL THOSE THINGS! It’s what I want in my life and I work hard for it. I want and love my kid but that doesn’t mean that I don’t love myself.
Oh Erin, I love this post beyond any words, although I’ll try 😉 There are so many things that I heard from the “older” crew about becoming a mom while I was pregnant. They would say things like, oh you’ll never have time to go out again, you’ll never lose the weight, you’ll never have time to put on make up, you’ll never wear clean clothes again, you’ll never have time to concentrate on your career, you’ll never…well you get it. and you know what? I was SO UPSET! And you know what else? I DID ALL THOSE THINGS! It’s what I want in my life and I work hard for it. I want and love my kid but that doesn’t mean that I don’t love myself.
Great post & even when you are in PJ’s I bet you are darling~but I’m sure you’d rather be in a cute outfit…my kids got to where they called my gym clothes my ‘uniform’ and I decided change HAD TO HAPPEN! I thought I’d forget who I was when I became a mom {I was a school teacher before} and boy I sure didn’t forget….I teach ALL DAY, EVERY SINGLE DAY at home 🙂 And I don’t always teach it right, but as long as I’m consistent, I’m okay. My how my perspective has changed! Oh, the most peaceful part of my day is the ride home from carpool drop off~I am ALONE 🙂 ha!!! Loved that part of your post!
so true..my girls are older and I always have one in tow..so sad that going to Publix is such a big day out!! I love that Hudson sucks his thumb, my middle daughter did too and she looked so cute!
I LOVED this – so very well said. What a joy, privilege and heck of a lot of work to raise these wonderful, precious souls! It’s so much more than a jaw-dropping nursery and adorable outfits [although I consider those perks of the whole thing – ha!].
You are an awesome momma… I’m sure of it! 🙂 Thanks for this post!