After one year of being a mom to the greatest, funniest little boy in the world, I thought I’d share my {real} experiences and let you in on what I’ve learned. I wrote a similar post a few months ago if you’d like to go back and read that one.
- The year started off with a tremendous amount of fear. I was so afraid of what would happen when I brought him home. Or what would happen when my mom went back to Texas. Could I take care of him by myself? How? I’m just a girl! How did I end up with a baby? What if I accidentally drop him or he gets sick? The level of responsibility is tremendous and I was terrified.
- I learned after two days alone with him that I am his mother. I know him better than anyone knows him. He’s counting on me and my primary job is to love and protect him. I can do that!
- But I do screw up. He rolled off the ottoman when he was 3 months old. Who knew he could roll over? No one knew until that minute! And a few weeks ago he practically leapt off the changing table. He cried a little bit and I felt terrible. But things happen and the guilt will consume you. And you don’t forget it for second when those things happen.
- Modesty goes out the window. There’s no time for modesty. I’ve already shown my goods to a room full of people, so at follow up doctor’s appointments I don’t get embarrassed like I used to. Or if my mom wants to see my stretch marks I’ll show them to her!
- Nothing grosses me out. I’ve been puked on, pooped on, peed on. It happens. I just hurry to clean it up and get the job done.
- There is no love like the one I feel for my child. And it brings into perspective just how much my parents love me. And then I remember the horrible way I spoke to them when I was in high school and the lies that I told so I could do what I wanted. I’ve probably apologized to my parents more in the past year for things that I did 10 years ago than I did when I was actually doing those things!
- Everything is seen through Hudson’s eyes. I get excited about the tiniest things that I’ve taken for granted over the years. Like a day at the beach!
- My best girlfriends are such incredible sources of strength and humor!
- I love having conversations that aren’t about babies, baby things, baby clothes, baby tips, baby ideas. Baby, baby, baby. It’s nice to take a break and focus on being Erin. The mom job is 24/7, so just an hour long break is always appreciated.
- I want to give Hudson everything I can, but I don’t want to lose myself. When he goes to school or graduates from college, I don’t want to be wondering where my life went. I want to teach him the importance of being an individual and having a strong identity.
- I am so appreciative of our family and the support that we have. We have been so fortunate to have so much freedom and time to spend time with just the two of us because of TC’s parents. They love Hudson and love us and we’ve had some great nights out with their help. I also have no idea what I’d do without the constant support and love from my parents. Even from 17 hours away, I know that they’re going to laugh at the funny Hudson story I tell them. And if I need help they’re there to give me advice. What wonderful friends they are to me!
- I have a deep respect for single mothers and single fathers.
- This year would have been completely different without this blog and the community that I’ve found with it. Mommy bloggers to share stories. Non-mommy bloggers to take me away and make me life. And my friends. So many girls have helped me share stories and also helped me “get away” and laugh.
- Every single month gets easier and more fun. You start sleeping longer. You can start going to restaurants again because they can eat table food and are actually able to interact with you.
- And don’t forget, “You can fight a bear for a little while.” Or in this case, a toddler! Some days it’s just a test of wills and we’re working on patience for him and staying strong for me. Each day is a new day!
What a beautiful post Erin! Hudson is so lucky to have you as his mother. Reading this really made me excited to have children of my own one day (sooner than later hopefully)! Thank you for sharing your experiences, both good and bad, with us.
That last picture is so beautiful. I am glad to know that I am not the only one who thinks some of these things – the fear, etc before having a child. I don’t have any yet, but I already worry about it!
I fell asleep while nursing my 2 week old at the time. My arm relaxed and she slid right out and hit the wood floor. Talk about guilt! I ran to my husband, crying, “She hit the floor. I fell asleep. She hit the floor. What if she doesn’t walk someday? Or talk? I’ll know it’s because she hit the floor when she was 2 weeks old. *sobbing* ”
But she’s almost 1 now, and she seems fine to me. 🙂 But you’re right… you never forget it.
And why does it always happen when I’m on duty? I swear, I watch my kids vigilantly… WAY better than my husband does. 😉 And yet, they get hurt on my watch, never on his. Maybe it’s because I’m on duty 98% of the time, so odds are: it’s gonna happen when I’m here.
Girl, I am not a parent but think its safe to say that children are some of life’s greatest teachers!! Loved this post!! 🙂
Thanks for sharing! You’re such a great Mom! When we’re ready to have a little one I will definitely be reading your archives for advice! And you look super happy in all your pics 🙂
Love this, even as a non-mama! And… I WANT MORE TT PHOTOS!
What a great post! And what a great woman/wife/daughter/friend you are! And i love you for all of it 🙂 hugs
Thank you for this!! Sometimes on the weeks where being a mom can seem more overwhelming than usual, it’s reading things like this that make me realize I’m being a crazy maniac! haha 🙂 Thanks for bringin me back down to earth AND for the adorable pics of your sweet boy!! I’ll toast a nice big glass of wine tonight to all of us moms who are still just girls/wives/friends, but who sometimes forget to nurture those sides of us…
How sweet!! I cannot wait til my feelings of being terrified are over and I can look forward to being a mommy..Beautiful photos!
AWWW… what a great post. I feel the exact same way about mine! 🙂
Erin that was so sweet. I loved hearing about your first year, and knowing there were ups and downs. Hudson is so lucky to have a wonderful family like yours. Happy one year to you! You’ve done great!
What a great mommy you are. 🙂
This is such an honest and candid post. I have a 4 month old and the time is flying by. I’m glad one day I will be able to go back to restaurants! =)
What a great post!! The pictures are wonderful….I absolutely cannot wait to be a mommy someday.
It is so comforting to read your blog! I am starting to think about my future and keep seeing myself as more being more of a stay at home mom rather than a businesswoman and it is seriously freaking me out! haha I don’t want to regret anything later in life. I used to imagine myself as being an independant girl, who’d travel the world aimlessly, learning about new cultures, meeting new people yada yada and now that I have found the right guy all I can think about is starting a life together and eventually a family – scaring the crap outta me :-p But you make is so clear that as women, we will continue to push ourselves to be our best but that being a mother is such a terrific role and to be grateful for it. We can do it all =)
What a great post, Erin! It is obvious through these pictures and just following your blog that you are a great Mom! H is lucky to have you! 🙂
Love this post, friend! Makes me a little less terrified for when my time for mommy-hood comes. Also, I adore the “you can fight a bear for a little while” phrase- haven’t heard it in ages!!
I loved this post, Erin! Everything you said was so true!
We let Brody roll off the couch, too. He started rolling over at 5 1/2 weeks old! Who knew some babies rolled that early? Not me! 🙂
Hudson is so blessed to have you for a mom!
And I loved all the pictures!!
Such a great post, Erin! I can totally relate to every point!
great post erin!! you are a great mama to your little man and he’s so blessed to have you!
and i agree, the blogging community makes this a lot more tolerable when i’m pulling my hair out and can come to you ladies for help!
Such a great post!
Thank you so much for writing this post! Not only was in very sweet to read, but very inspiring to some one who in in the stage of life where they will become a mother within the next few years of life. I particularly loved your statement about being scared if you would be a good mother and then realizing that you know your son better than anyone else and your thoughts on the importance of still being you and not losing yourself. Thanks again!
I love this post and the honesty!! You have such a beautiful family and Hudson keeps getting cuter everyday!
beautiful post, erin. I agree with so much of what you learned and I’m only 4 months in!
Also, I LOVE the quote about fighting the bear. You posted it once as a comment to me and it really stuck with me. Love it!
What a wonderful post:-). I think it’s amazing that you are both able to relish every second of being mommy while still wanting to be in touch with Erin-as you were before you were Hudson’s mommy. You’re doing an amazing job! Thanks so much for letting us share your journey with you!
This post made me smile. And giggle. I’m just waiting for the day that Amelia rolls off the changing table…the girl is straight-antsy these days.
Such a sweet post that so many of us can relate to.
I love this post! I have been thinking about doing a similar one about milestones in the last year and how I used to always wish for what is next and how I used to have all those “I can’t wait moments,” and now that I am a mom, I just want things to slow down. You are beautiful Erin! You light up in the pictures with him and I can see how happy you are! Hudson is such a lucky little guy, to have you as a mommy! I feel so blessed to have you as a friend! I can’t wait till we get to meet and hug! HA!
I love the pull my finger post below! Could he get any cuter! Also, LOVE LOVE LOVE the dress you wore to the wedding on Saturday!
I posted about the moment of silence on Thursday on my blog tonight… great idea! Love you!
Beautiful pictures and such a sweet post.
I admire your honesty so much. You are an amazing mother and Hudson is so lucky to have you. The new pictures are absolutely gorgeous!
Great post Erin — I’m hoping to become a Mom in the next year or so and I absolutely love your perspective. You are so honest and so positive. Thank you!
By the way — that picture at the beach warmed my heart. What fun! What a beautiful happy little boy. 🙂
Oh my goodness- I’m crying right here at my desk at work! This is a precious, precious post! As a mommy to an (almost) 4-year-old, it takes me back to that first year with my baby. Isn’t being a mommy the greatest??
This post is so refreshing. I love how honest you are about life and motherhood. I can’t wait to one day be a mom and this post is relate able, because right now I am just a girl. Through your blog it is apparent how excellent of a mother you are. I can’t wait to read more as Hudson gets older.
Erin, I love your new pictures!! 🙂 What a beautiful moment your photographer captured of you and Hudson. 🙂 Motherhood is absolutely amazing and there is no greater blessing! 🙂
This is a beautiful post, it has been such a delight to watch and read and learn from your experiences with your dear and darling Hudson. Clearly a year filled with love, and with real-life experiences that many of us can only marvel at, and admire.
Congratulations on his Birthday and your year of a family marked by such joy and happiness!
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that last pic is just so cute and sweet. looks like such happiness! hope you have a great 4th!