Erin Akin Carroll

I need to give a great big shout out to my husband. Our house went on the market last week while I was in Dallas. Before I left, I made sure to put things in their place and get all of the laundry taken care of. But other than that, Todd was responsible for getting everything ready. He took “getting the house ready to sell” to a whole new level and I’m so proud of him!

I wasn’t shocked, but sometimes men have a tendency to leave things lying around or not care if something is put away or not. But when Hudson and I got home last night, I noticed that Todd had cleared out closets to make room for Hudson’s toys. So we can put Hudson’s toys away in the closet right before we show the house. He planted flowers in the planters outside our front door. Seriously. I don’t even do that. I have a black thumb. But Todd did it!

He and his parents turned our previously nasty back yard into an adorable little outdoor haven. The backyard project was something we’ve wanted to do since we moved in and now that we’re about to (hopefully) move it is getting done.

I can’t blame him for waiting to do something to the backyard. After we looked at houses in the neighborhood of our choice, we have both gotten really excited. Todd’s motivating factor is the golf course. My motivating factor is a larger living room. But whatever the motivation, we’ve found it and we’re on a mission to sell this house.

We don’t have any official news to report on our house at this point. We had a few lookers last week and there will be an open house this weekend. Frankly, I’m thrilled that we’ve had any traffic at all with just seven days on the market.

We did a lot of de-cluttering and we’ll probably do some more before we move. Between the two of us, we have a lot of books that we’re not ready to get rid of. When we got married and moved into this house we reached a compromise. I had about 10 years of Martha Stewart Weddings and InStyle Weddings magazines. Todd had about 15 years of Sports Illustrated magazines. I didn’t really want the Sports Illustrated magazines taking up the little amount of storage space that I had and he didn’t want my wedding magazines doing that either. We both went through our magazines, tore out the things we wanted, and recycled the magazines. I put all of the tear outs in a wedding inspiration binder.

Todd and I put some things in storage that we know we’ll want later, but we just needed our house to look a little bit more empty. Dumb bells on the floor and my big exercise ball weren’t exactly a home-buyer’s ideal master bedroom accessories.

It’s so hard to keep your house looking absolutely immaculate all the time. Because, honestly? We live here. Hudson and I are here all day, every day. We’re going to make messes. So I’m going to try my hardest to make sure that if someone calls and wants to show our house, we’re ready. It should only take me 10 minutes to get the house ready and get all of us out the door.

We’re in “operation: get the house sold” mode and we’ll do what it takes to make it happen.

If my husband can plant flowers in our planters outside, I can keep the house clean at all times.

What challenges have you faced to get what you really want? What sacrifices have you made to keep your partner happy?

Honestly, I don’t miss those magazines at all. They were always a pain to move and they weighed 128 pounds! (I don’t know that for sure, but it’s just a guess.)

My girl crush, Carrie Underwood, won entertainer of the year for the second year in a row at the ACM awards last night. I know I’ve written about Carrie a couple of times, but I think she is so gifted and so beautiful. She’s also humble and grateful. And she always remembers to thank the most important people in her life that got her where she is today and never forgets to thank God. Todd and I are going to see her in concert in May right before we leave for our anniversary trip. I’m not sure which one of us is more excited.

I like country music a lot, but I wouldn’t call myself a “fan” of many groups. I’m more into the songs and if an artist or group has a lot of great songs then I’ll become a real fan. I am a huge fan of Carrie’s.

Carrie had a few wardrobe changes last night, and she hit a high note with all of them!

in Basil Soda

this glittering mini-dress was a little short– I was actually nervous for her a few times, but she looked amazing in it.

in a dreamy gown to perform “Temporary Home”- I love this colors in this gown

in Rafael Cennamo- so adorable!

Did you watch the ACM awards? Who was your favorite performer last night? Who was best-dressed? Do you love Carrie as much as I do?

I’m almost finished reading So Long Insecurity by Beth Moore. I wanted to have a head start on the conference content at the end of next week in Atlanta.

The book has been such a great resource for me to dig down deep to nail down what my specific insecurities are and why I have those insecurities. It’s much cheaper than therapy, and we know that Beth Moore is speaking the Truth, not a lot of doctor speak. I’ve learned that many other women are just as insecure as I am.

It may help me to take a minute to put my insecurities out there so I can hold myself accountable in my efforts to conquer these insecurities.

1. My appearance- specifically my weight

I know we all struggle with this. There have only been a couple of time periods in my life when I’ve actually been happy about the way I look. The scale has to say a certain number. I have to fit into a certain size clothes. I finally hit that magic number. And I finally fit into clothes that had a little number on them that I always thought was unattainable. But now, post baby, I’m a long way from those numbers and sizes. And I put so much of my self-worth and confidence into those numbers and sizes.

I’ve also started to notice that my face looks different. Maybe it’s all in my head, but I’m starting to look my age.

One of my favorite quotes from Steel Magnolias is “Honey, time marches on and eventually you realize it’s marchin’ across your face.”

I look in the mirror now and I honestly don’t feel like I look like the same care-free person that I used to. Life is definitely more stressful now because my responsibilities are greater, but I don’t want it to show up in my appearance.

I think the reason for these feelings is obvious. Magazines, celebrities, television, movies, social media. All of these factors contribute to me holding myself to a standard that is unhealthy for me and my security.

2. Inadequacy

When I was working, I always felt like I didn’t have a prestigious enough job. I worked for the state and I was surrounded by attorneys (my husband’s friends). Or I’d meet people at meetings who had jobs that seemed much more important than mine.

I spend too much time basing my self-worth on what someone else has done or accomplished.

I always knew that my decisions about what field of study and work I wanted to enter were the right decisions, but I also felt like I had a lot of explaining to do about what it was I was doing. This made me feel so tired and I ended up avoiding the topic, most of the time.

Now, I couldn’t be more proud of the work that I do every day in our home.

3.  Nobody Likes Me

I’m an outgoing person and I love meeting new people. But I always walk away wondering if someone likes me. Or if I don’t get invited to something and I feel like everyone else got invited, I start feeling like someone doesn’t like me and doesn’t want to be my friend.

I have fantastic friends and I am absolutely content with the beautiful relationships that I have in my life. But something always reminds me that I wasn’t invited to a certain girls outing or wasn’t included in something else and I always start to take it personally.

Actually it’s not something that reminds me. It’s Satan.

As for why I feel this way, I’d say it probably has a lot to do with the fact that I’ve moved so many times and have started over in new schools and new towns. These experiences were wonderful in the end, but the beginning was always rough. Looking for new friends and trying to figure out where you fit in can be challenging at any age.

Reading this book has been such an eye-opening experience for me. It has been great for me to tackle my insecurities and face them head-on. They haven’t vanished, by any means, but I can deal with every day and remind myself to say goodbye to insecurity.

I think the most important thing to remember is that if you’re struggling with insecurity, you’re definitely not the only one. The girl that you most admire and aspire to be like is probably even more insecure than you are.

My goal every day is to let the Lord be my source of security and to ask Him to help me to love myself just as much as He loves me. I was created to be the woman that He wants me to be. And the most I can do is live my life to honor Him.

Hudson and I are in Dallas this week visiting my parents and I’ve been able to see lots of friends while I’ve been here.

Today, Hudson and I got to meet up with my friend Mrs. Preppy and her daughter, A. We decided to have a picnic at the Dallas Arboretum and walk around looking at the beautiful blooms. We stopped by Central Market on the way and picked up some yummy sandwiches.

Hudson and A were adorable in the backseat in their car seats. They kept looking at each other and A would say, “hey!” It was the cutest thing.

We had a great time and I always love spending time with them. It’s especially nice to spend time with other moms and kids.

Of course we took some pictures of our sweet babies today.

Mr. Social fell asleep just after we finished lunch, but he loved his nap while we strolled around.