Erin Akin Carroll

I’m writing this today because I’m big into commitments. And I committed to 31 Days of Back to Basics Blogging. So I’m just going to keep blogging about our days.

And some days are just ugly.

All day I’ve felt like my spirit was under attack. From the moment I woke up this morning, our day was in a tail spin.

We had a real estate agent schedule a home showing, but a specific time wasn’t narrowed down. We were frantically cleaning this morning and trying to get everyone dressed and out the door.

The chaos of the morning made me late and I had to miss my community Bible study, which is one of the things I look most forward to every week. I love the fellowship and I love learning from the leaders and all the other ladies. I was really looking forward to diving more into Proverbs and learning more about humility.

But our plans changed.

And I snapped at Todd. And I unloaded on my mom, who is very often the person who gets to hear about what’s annoying me. I lost my patience with Hudson when he insisted on wearing what he wore yesterday.

I had my first big breakdown over the house selling process and what a burden and imposition it can be on all of us at times.

It’s a rainy, gloomy day. The house showing did eventually happen. I ended up being about 10 minutes late to pick up Hudson, because in the crazy parts of the morning I neglected to check my daily calendar. I thought he had lunch at school today, and he didn’t.

Needless to say, it was an ugly day. I don’t have any photos. I don’t have any funny stories.

But when I was driving home from getting Hudson from school, I just prayed out loud. I prayed that God would protect our family and guard my heart and just turn this day around. To remove the black cloud from over my head. To help me to slow down and gain some perspective. And maybe even find some joy.

And immediately I thought of James 1. I have read the book of James so many times, and now those verses are just in me. They’re there when I need to slow down and gain perspective. They’re hiding in my heart.

James 1:2-4

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

 

So maybe I could just consider today’s trial a joy. Maybe?

It was a rotten day. But I can consider it joy. Because I know that my faith was absolutely tested today. And it was a reminder to speak kindly, be patient, and remember that God’s plan is perfect.

I don’t have all the answers and I know we all have days where we want to scream, “What the heck?!”

But after a few hours, and a good phone call from a Soul Sister, I’m considering it joy. I’m learning.

*This is Day 4 of 31 Days of Back to Basics Blogging

We’ve had an unusually busy week. Or I guess I should say that I’ve had an unusually busy week. Lots of meetings and it’s just one of those weeks.

I had a Junior League meeting this morning after the boys were at school. My friend Anna was there, too, and after the meeting was over we realized we had about an hour to kill before we had to go pick up the kiddos from school. We had a very rare treat– a Starbucks date. We laughed and joked that this is what we always imagined we’d get to do every single day.

Hudson was in a bit of a funk on the way home from school today. About once a week he gets like that. He is either really tired, really hungry, or just in a “preschooler” mood. (It’s so weird not to say a “toddler” mood.) He was mad because Hayes was looking at him. He was mad because he was hot and then he was cold. And he was mad because he never wants to come home from school. He just loves school.

And I just think he needed a nap.

He actually just wanted to lay down on the floor when he got home. He definitely needed a nap.

Hayes, on the other hand, was in an especially good mood today. When I pick him up close to noon, he’s usually ready for me to get there. He’s tired and just ready to go. Today he was running around and just giggling. He was in the best mood, and that made me so happy.

Wednesday is one of our favorite days every week because we all go to church. We have dinner as a family and then I go to choir and Hudson goes to AWANA. He has been doing really well with his scripture memorization, and he just gets so excited to recite his verses for anyone that will listen.

Todd had deacon ordination tonight at church. He just finished his term as deacon chairman for our church, and we watched a good friend of ours get ordained tonight. When deacon ordination was over, Todd took the boys home because they were both just so tired today.

Even though Hudson did a lot of whining and had a funky attitude today, I have to remember that it’s normal for 3 year old. It’s normal for a 30 year old! Sometimes I feel the exact same way. There are days when I’m tired and feel like whining all day. I don’t want to eat my lunch and I don’t want to talk to anyone. So how can I blame him for having a day like that?

The other night,  Todd and I were turning out the lights and getting ready to head upstairs to bed. I glanced down at the floor and saw this.

 

I could feel my heart tighten in my chest. There was an immediate lump in my throat.

Those little shoes. They’re for little feet. And those little feet are just an adorable part of two very special little people who live here. My babies. God’s children.

I was overcome with this incredibly strong sense of gratitude. And sometimes God just uses those little symbols as reminders for something really big.

I’m thankful for another day with them. Some days are crummy. Some days are great. And some days one of the boys is great and one of them is a little bit crummy. And then they flip flop.

But I’m thankful for each day. And for each little pair of stinky shoes.

This post is Day 3 in my 31 Days of Back to Basics Blogging series.