I mentioned yesterday the idea of at-home date nights. I decided that if I’m going to give this a try at my house, I should come up with a good list of different at-home date night ideas. This helps us simplify, but also helps us get creative and be a little more thoughtful when it comes to planning our dates. This helps us save money by not having to hire a babysitter. I love our babysitter, but it does get expensive. And it’s kind of stressful for someone else to put your kids to bed.

These 20 ideas only work if both people are on board. No checking your phone, no glancing at the TV to catch the score (unless it’s part of the “date”) and no grumbling. Enjoy your time together.

If you have kids, put your kids to bed and make sure they are sound asleep. The whole idea is to do this without having to hire a babysitter and without having to send the kids to the grandparents’ house.

1. If you’re watching your favorite football team play, put on your school colors, fix hot dogs and have nachos. Treat it like you’re at the game!
2. Play board games—or do like we do and play Connect Four
3. Sit outside on your back patio or on your front porch and eat your supper.
4. Fix a picnic in front of the TV.
5. Create a playlist of your favorite songs and dance.
6. Rent a movie and have popcorn. (But rent the movie before your date night!)
7. Turn off the TV and read books. Just sitting next to each other is so relaxing.
8. Cook an amazing dessert and indulge. Eat it straight out of the pan!
9. Take a walk down memory lane and spend time reminiscing about when you met and where you went together.
10. Grill in the backyard and eat outside.
11. Watch each other’s favorite movies- no matter how much you don’t like his favorite movie!
12. Cook your favorite comfort food and veg out on the couch after dinner.
13. Cook a fancy meal and light the candles in the dining room.
14. Write love notes to each other.
15. Watch a concert on DVD- I love Fleetwood Mac “The Dance” concert DVD
16. Order your favorite take out.
17. Dress up. Not super dressy clothes, but look like you didn’t just spend all day working or chasing kids.
18. Watch your favorite TV show on the DVR- or if it’s Friday, do what we do and watch Dateline NBC after dinner.
19. Have theme nights. If his favorite movie is Rocky, watch Rocky while eating Rocky Road Ice Cream. Your favorite movie is Sixteen Candles, so get silly, put on a prom dress and eat birthday cake while watching the movie. Maybe you are watching Moonstruck and want to cook a huge pot of spaghetti and meatballs. Get creative!
20. Watch your wedding video while snuggling on the couch.

Do you have any ideas for date nights at home? What do you like to do?

*I actually don’t even like The Princess Bride, but I couldn’t resist.

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I am really enjoying the Mom to Mom Bible study that I’ve been participating in at church on Tuesday mornings. This week we talked about the “monsters” that plague our marriages and I could relate to so many of them.

Despite our obvious flaws, I think that TC and I have a great marriage. We’re not perfect and we definitely have our share of spats and arguments. I am, actually, usually the instigator. For those that know me in real life, I’m sure this does not surprise you. Our marriage has its share of difficulties. But we share some very critical, common beliefs. When we first starting dating, we knew where the other one stood in their relationship with Christ. And being married to TC has only strengthened my relationship with Christ.

We also happen to be very good friends. I just love him. He makes me laugh, he makes me roll my eyes, he makes me angry and he impresses me on a daily basis.

I am so glad to know that making an effort to work on your marriage is normal. Because I have to work at being thoughtful. I have to make a conscious effort to be thoughtful. I know what he likes and I know what makes him happy. But there are some days when I feel like I don’t have anything else to give. So reminding myself to greet him with a smile instead of unloading my day on him is something I do every day.

I know that petty annoyances don’t bother him a bit, so I don’t need to waste my time going on and on about something that drove me nuts.

I am tired. And I spend my entire day chasing little people and responding to cries, whines, requests and tantrums. After my children go to bed, I’m ready to lie down on the couch and not think. But I know that having good, quality conversation (not heavy conversation, but taking the time to listen) is something that I need to make time for every single day.

During our Bible study yesterday, we were talking about the importance of spending alone time together. We need to be going away on weekend trips together or just going out alone for frozen yogurt. But when kids are involved, it’s hard to do those things because you have to also get a babysitter– and sometimes the hassle of that and the expense make you question whether or not it’s worth it. And if you don’t have kids, spending the money to go out at all doesn’t always seem worth it.

A sweet girl in our Bible study mentioned that she and her husband have date nights at home once a week and I loved this idea! Tomorrow I’m going to post a list of ideas for at-home date nights.

In Mom to Mom, we learned that it’s probably a good idea to make a list of why we married our husbands. What do you love about him? Why did you say “yes” to him? Writing those things down is great because you’re focusing on the positive and it’s just a great resource to go back and look at if you’ve had an argument or you’re having a hard day.

I need to always remember to treat TC the way I want him to treat me. I need to remember what his Love Language is and do things based on that. What makes him happy and what makes him feel loved?

In our hectic and busy lives, it’s often hard to remember that marriages take work and effort. And sometimes we just don’t have anymore work and effort to give. But isn’t this the most important place where we need to put our work and our effort?

Every week in our study, our Children’s Minister gives us a “Challenge Card” for the week. This is what ours said this week.

“Love your husband deeply from the heart.” 1 Peter 1:22

Dear God,

Help me to enrich my husband’s life this week. Help me not to hinder my husband this week, but to help him.

Recently, I had a moment where I decided that I needed to put aside my attitude about some things in my life. It took a while for me to lose the attitude, so I decided to be obedient with my actions and just do what I needed to do because it was the right thing to do. And sure enough, my attitude followed my actions.

And you know what?

TC noticed.

I got a beautiful flower delivery on Tuesday morning. For no particular reason at all. But he noticed the change in me and it made him happy. Knowing that I did something to make him happy (just by changing my outlook and attitude about something) meant much more to me than some flowers. But I appreciated his gesture and gift of thanks just as I know he appreciated my change.

I love the “Challenge Cards” and love the opportunity that I’m getting each week to learn how to rest, listen and become a better wife and mom. Because I know I need all the help I can get.

On Friday mornings, Hudson and I go to The Little Gym. Our wonderful babysitter comes over to keep Hayes, so I can take Hudson to his class and focus on him during that whole time. Because I had our babysitter at the house already, I decided to take advantage of having only one child in tow and head to Target and Publix to run my errands for our Halloween party.

I had a huge list of things I needed to pick up and because I was afraid of forgetting something, I went down every single aisle in the store, checking things off my list and filling my buggy. Hudson was having a great time and was actually being very patient. I got to the check out line and put everything on the belt. I went to get my credit card out of my wallet and … oh crap. My wallet wasn’t there. I couldn’t find it anywhere. And I knew exactly where it was.

My wallet was at my house, in my camera bag. I had driven all over town that morning without my wallet. Without my license.

The Target employee was very kind and understanding and after I apologized and my face turned beat red, she told me I could leave my buggy off to the side and come back to pay for everything. I don’t live far from Target so I knew it wouldn’t take that long to get back. But I was so upset. I got in the car and sent Nina a Hey Tell message and vented. Then I called TC and told him I was about to cry over this.

Why was I so upset?

Because I felt like I had no control. I had tried so hard to make it easy on myself by going to Target while our babysitter was keeping one child. I made sure I didn’t forget a single thing on my list. How often do I get to have a casual stroll through Target? It was all working out so great… and then I opened my purse and saw that I was missing the only thing I really needed in that moment.

This isn’t the first time something like this has happened. I got pulled over when Hudson was about a year old. I wasn’t speeding. But my plates were expired. How could I forget to put the new sticker on my license plate?

Or we leave the house for the whole day and I’ve gotten everything, but I forgot to put more diapers in the diaper bag and there’s not a store or a “spare diaper” anywhere in sight.

It’s “mommy brain” at its finest. For the first time in my life, I have missed doctor’s appointments by accident and find out the next day when the doctor’s office calls to ask if I would like to reschedule. (In my defense, our ENT has stopped calling to remind us.) I forget to write things down (can’t blame this on my Life Planner!) and just go on with my day not even realizing that I’ve missed an appointment. Forget about the fact that it will take me six months to get in for a rescheduled appointment.

I know it’s not worth getting worked up over. The most frustrating thing about mishaps, disorganization and feeling frazzled is that, usually, in my case, it leads to lost time. Wasted time. And at this point in my life, time is so very precious.

I only have so much time while my kids are this age. I only have so much time between Hayes’s feedings and naps to get things done. I only have so many minutes of time to myself where I can blog, respond to emails or read. I can’t get time back once its gone and I want to be so diligent and disciplined with the way I spend it.

I don’t want to be taking my sweet time browsing the aisles at Target and get to the front of the check out line only to find out that I have no way to pay.

Do you ever feel this way? Do you have a story?

Another Halloween has come and gone. I just can’t believe it!

We hosted a Halloween party on Sunday night and invited our friends from our Sunday school class and their children. This was really the first time that all of the kids in our Sunday school class have been able to just hang out, so I was really excited about that. I wanted our party to be low-key and kid-friendly, but also have lots of yummy food for the parents.

We ended up having about 20 adults and 9 kids in our tiny house on Sunday evening. It was a crowd, but we love having people in our home!

Nina and I both hosted parties this weekend and I have had so much fun brainstorming with her every day for the past couple of months as we discussed our party plans. Her party was truly Spooktacular!

After church on Sunday morning, I started cooking and didn’t stop until the doorbell rang and our first guests arrived. I had to dash up to our bedroom to throw some clothes on– and I totally forgot to check myself in the mirror before running back downstairs to greet our friends. That’s just how it is sometimes. Details and plans don’t end up happening because you run out of time or realize that on the big to-do list for the party, something’s gotta go.

For me this year, it was our balloons. I ordered these precious giant black and white polka dot balloons from Shop Sweet Lulu. I blew up the first balloon with my helium tank that I bought and it filled up with air, but the balloon didn’t rise. The same thing happened to my second giant balloon. The third one rose to the ceiling, but I needed to have three of them. I ended up just saying “forget it” and threw the blown up balloons into our guest bedroom to hide! Something had to go!

The menu ended up being really delicious! I made Mummy Dogs, chili, Creepy Chocolate Pretzels (with candy corn), Witches Hats cookies, cupcakes and Crunchy Batwings (a recipe that Nina sent me). We also had four different flavors of popcorn from Cromer’s, a local party store that has the “guaranteed worst in town” boiled peanuts. And they have the best popcorn. This season they have some autumn spice popcorn that is truly to die for.

There were so many things I completely forgot to get pictures of, but that’s what happens when you’re having a great time!

Details:

The super sweet girls at Sweet Birdie’s Nest created the adorable printables and they were such a hit. Their creativity always amazes me and I love having their little details at our parties.

I was able to use so many things that I already had around the house for the party.

I had a bunch of serving pieces that were wedding gifts and all of the orange buckets were from Hudson’s first birthday party.

I used my three Willow House Savannah Beverage Servers for the drinks, my Willow House Nola Party Bucket and stand for the ice and bottled waters, and my Willow House Hemingway Hurricane vases for the centerpieces. I filled my apothecary jars with yellow, orange, black and white candies. I bought fun black and white fabric and pom pom trim at Hobby Lobby and my sweet mom stitched the trim onto it for me.

The striped straws, popcorn paper cones and balloons (not pictured) were from Shop Sweet Lulu.

I found tons of great little Halloween accessories at Hobby Lobby when they had all of their Halloween decorations at 40% off. Love that Hobby Lobby!

Then last night, we had a fun night with family just doing a little low-key trick-or-treating. I got both boys in their costumes (a fireman and a dalmatian) and finally got a picture of the two of them together. It only took 5 and a half months!

TC’s mom and dad came over to have leftover chili with us and we took Hudson and Hayes to our next door neighbors’ houses so Hudson could say “trick or treat” and get a few pieces of candy. Our neighbors know him, so we didn’t feel too bad when they said, “you can have two pieces” and then Hudson replied with, “can I have 3 chocolates?” Ha! He’s such a negotiator!

He loves wearing his fireman costume and Hayes, bless his heart, is so laid back that he just didn’t seem to mind a bit that his mommy dressed him up like a little dalmatian.

I think Halloween is so much fun for little kids and getting them dressed up and talking about pumpkins and the color orange is just so much fun! (It’s a big deal for me to even utter the word “orange.” It’s a forbidden color and forbidden word in Gamecock country. So I take advantage of the excuse to wear orange in October!)

We love a holiday and love an excuse to spend time with friends and family to celebrate something, no matter if we’re celebrating the fact that it’s Thursday or an actual holiday. I hope you and your family had a very happy Halloween and are enjoying this fall season.