I’ve been blogging for nearly four years now. How did that happen? What began as a little hobby that I paid attention to maybe once a week has become so much more than that in my life.
I’ve had so many opportunities to let it die and forget about it, but I never have. And will I ever? I just don’t know.
In the past few weeks, I have noticed myself becoming more and more emotional. I guess those part-partum feelings of overwhelming, gut-wrenching love are finally catching up with me. I have become more and more aware of how precious every single day is with my boys. Each milestone causes my heart to break.
When Hudson was little, I celebrated every milestone. I praised him and encouraged him to do everything again. I was so excited for him to move on to each new thing.
photo by Angela Shea Photography
Now that Hayes is here, I feel a hint of sadness when he rolls over or when he reaches up and grabs the toys on his activity gym. Those are just the smallest little milestones, but I’m not ready to say goodbye to each phase. When he hits one milestone, I know another, bigger milestone is coming soon.
Even though I don’t always blog about my kids or the specifics of what they’re up to, blogging helps me memorialize every day. There are words from my heart occupying a tiny space in the world wide web.
I’m no longer working outside the home, so I don’t see the fruits of my labor coming to life in that way anymore. In a way, blogging has helped me find my voice. I am able to record my emotions. Share my stories. And there is always at least one person who tells me that they’re going through the same thing or feeling the same way. This is my little journal and it has become such a great little outlet for me. Sometimes days pass and I don’t have anything to say. But most days I can’t wait to just sit down and write just so I can find a way to express the way I feel. This blog is my voice and it’s a place where I can catch up with friends.
Over time, I may find a new way to express myself. I could start painting (highly doubtful) or crafting. Or maybe I”ll become a runner (again, highly doubtful). Or I could start becoming a serious cook! But it’s important that as I get overcome with responsibility for my little loves that I still maintain a place for myself. So my voice can be heard.
I love looking back to read what was going on just two years ago. And I know that someday I will look back and read that I was completely emotional about the fact that Hayes is almost four months old and how I never want him to grow up. I’ll read about how it was so crazy to watch Hudson become so big overnight when his brother was born.
photo by Angela Shea Photography
Taking twenty to thirty minutes every day to sit down and write has become a priority and it makes such a difference in each day. I do it for them and I do it for me.
I am still me. I am a mom, but I haven’t changed in every way. But it would be a lie to say that motherhood hasn’t changed me at all. My heart has completely changed. Who knew your heart could accommodate so much love? But I’m so happy the evolution is recorded in this blog. I can always go back to read about my kids and I can read about what was going on with m in my early life as a mommy.
What is your outlet? Where do you find your sweet spot?
Blogging has been my therapy. Especially since I had Grayson almost a year ago. I never thought I would love blogging as much as I do…now I can’t imagine not doing this!
You’re an awesome mom and an awesome blogger!!! 🙂 And i love you!
Love this post. I have just started blogging, mostly to share my days and thoughts with the family members and friends that read my blog – maybe I will find my “niche” soon?
And – I’m going to need to know where you got that tunic. LOVE it!!!
I agree! Becoming a mom was the most isolating thing I have ever done. Blogging helped me connect with other moms (and just other sweet blogging girls), which helped me stay connected. I could sit on the couch, nursing my baby for hours a day, but tweet and blog and reach out to others so I did not feel so alone. And blogging helps me remember who I am – not just the lady who cuts up chicken nuggets and cleans up poop!
Hi,
I am a new follower and love your blog. I agree with alot of what you wrote here. My son is 2.5 and my daughter is 5.5 and everyday I think about how I wish time would just slow down. I miss the baby stage and it goes by way too fast. You truly have to take time to cherish the small things – that is so very true in life.
I love this post. I feel exactly the same way. On days where it seems like I’m all alone or need support, blogging/twitter are lifesavers.
We never imaged how overwhelming the love we have for each little one would be. Oh my goodness, they are all so different and similar and amazing. You know sometimes I get wrapped up in the negative aspects of blogging but once I (often) remind myself why I blog, I love love having all the memories stored and to share with fam and friends on a consistent basis too. I feel bad that I am so behind on recording some wonderful memories! But ’tis a season and I’ll get back to it :). Hugs beautiful and wonderful mama!
Running and blogging 🙂
Ok I totally understand I love to blog too. Where did you get the Tunic and the White Jeans? I love Tunic and the Tory Burch sandals are my favorite.
I’m a relatively new blogger and I don’t know if I’ve hit my stride with it yet (I struggle a little with coming up with material for posts!), but I enjoy it and I do love having a place to record my life as a newlywed with my husband. Blogging certainly reminds me to take more pictures (I’m horrible about remembering to take pictures of things!) 🙂 I’m really glad that you blog; Blue-Eyed Bride is one of my favorite reads 🙂
I love reading your blog – your writing is beautiful and you seem to be a great mom. I’m a mom for the first time too (our kids share a birthday) and I was always afraid how I will change once the baby is here, but now I see that I have not changed, I am still me, doing everything (OK mostly everything) I did before the baby. But like you said so beautifully – my heart has changed!
Good for you for staying true to yourself and admitting you’ve changed. Nothing wrong with evolving as a person. It’s bound to happen!
I have been blogging for 5 years but no one really knew about it until I started advertising it a couple of years later. It was just for me and used as a brain dump. Then it drastically changed when I got pregnant with my first. And now it’s become something that I still love to do and it has opened numerous opportunities to network with companies and meet new people. Yes, I do make some extra cash each month but that’s not what it’s about. I love writing about my boys. I love going back and reading. I love opening up about my struggles with bipolar disorder and the feeling that I’m helping someone else by being vunerable. I am completely open and honest because, well, it’s who I am. Always has been. That hasn’t changed. I now blog with the ultimate goal of publishing a book someday. I think it’s good to have a blog goal keeping in mind it can change and grow.
Someday when I am no longer blogging I hope to look back and be proud of what I wrote. Be grateful for the growth it brought about as a woman and a human being.
I recently started my own blog about our family to try and hold on to these days with my little boys. Everything went by so fast with my first. I don’t want to lose those memories again. I was inspired by your boys’ milestone posts to do this. this will be such a treasure trove for you and your children in the future.
I just wanted to say that I totally know what you mean about your toddler suddenly seeming grown up compared to your newborn. My 3 yr old seemed to grow a ton in the few days we were in the hospital. everything about him seemed so big and not at all like before. ( I guess b.c my nb was so little) I was so sad about that, like I lost a lot of time with him somehow.(where did my 1st baby go?)
I know it was just altered perception though in comparison to my little nb. It took a few wks for that sadness to go away, he still seems big but not in the Wow, haven’t seen you in years kind of way that he did right after baby was born.
Well said. I love your blog, hardly ever comment, but just wanted to say thanks for keepin’ on keepin’ on. I started blogging about the same time as you but am not as diligent even though I, too, love to sit down and write for a bit…thanks for this post, it inspired me 🙂
I’m relatively new to blogging, but I’ve always loved to write. I’ve written for as long as I can remember. And I’m so glad you blog. Even though our lives seem so different in so many ways, I can relate to so much that you write. Which makes me realize, that all us moms and wives (or at least most of us), working at home or working outside the home, one kid, two kids, or more, are doing our best to make sure that we raise the best kids we can. Thank you for being willing to share your life on a daily basis. I appreciate it.
Love these pretty pictures!! And I love that you blog! To answer your question: my outlet is also my blog + cooking. That may change one day, but for now, those 2 hobbies help me put my mind at ease at the end of the day. Oh…and maybe a bowl of ice cream too 🙂
i’m thankful for your blog. i’ve gotten to know you via twitter and you have introduced me to so many wonderful products and given me so many ideas for when we have a child.
Aww that is the sweetest post! I love the pictures of you and your babies too 🙂
I love blogging too, and started one 3 years ago. I love reading other blogs to get advice and share experience with evertday life. Having children is such an amazing, exhausting, uplifting, blessing, and I love it! I am a working mom right now, but after today I will become a SAHM and I can not express how happy that makes me. I have gone through every emotion and just feel led that this is the right decision for our family and feel so blessed that God has allowed me to stay home this time around!
I have already signed up to join a MOPS group in our area so I can meet other mommies like me. Blogging is still a great way to get advice and I think you are such an awesome mom!
Laura
laurasblondemoments.blogspot.com
I feel the same way about blogging. It helped me keep my voice when everything that I knew in life was changing. My little spot on the web has become a passion, and while I still don’t know everything there is about blog design and have yet to invest any money in it…I love it. I love it for the sanity that it brings to my day. I love it because I may not have brushed my hair yet, might be covered in applesauce from Zoe’s morning snack, I might be losing my mind in chaos…but I can still write. If I can find something funny in the middle of the chaos and write about it, I notice my perspective changes. And perspective can make or break your day.
I agree with you wholeheartedly. I absolutely love blogging, not only because it’s my hobby, but because I love going back and reading how I felt and what we were up to each day.